Honorable Mention - Hell on Earth, 2006 In the first Halloween episode since Season 3, Satan decides to plan a big, epic, Halloween party on Earth. It's done so in a parody of the TV series 'My Super Sweet Sixteen', having him act like a bratty teenager the whole time. The thing he wants most for this party is a life-sized Ferrari cake. In a different parody of 'Three Stooges', he hires Ted Bundy, John Wayne Gacy and Jeffrey Dahmer to pick it up and deliver it. All the while, Stooge-like comedy of violent proportions takes place. Meanwhile, the boys, along with Butters, Token and Tweek are playing what is essentially 'Bloody Mary', but using the name "Biggie Smalls". Surprisingly, Butters is successful in his attempt. But Biggie gets angry at his being summoned, because this now makes it very difficult to get back in time for Satan's party. The episode then becomes a buddy journey with Biggie and Butters, trying to get there. It's a good Halloween episode for it's comedy, but definitely lacked the tone of it's predecessors. That could be because Satan is already a somewhat sympathetic character in the 'South Park' universe. The 'Bloody Mary' parody is hilarious, and has a bit of that tone to it. But for the most part the episode plays out as off-the-wall goofy instead of dark comedy. An enjoyable one for the upcoming Halloween season nevertheless. Honorable Mention - Go God, Go / Go, God Go XII This is a two-parter that seems to get a lot of attention, but for some reason, it never really captured me. That said, enough people out there like them that I feel it definitely warrants mentioning. In the first half, Cartman is extremely anxious about having to wait three months for the release of Nintendo Wii. He therefore decides to freeze himself, with Butters' help. A freak avalanche then buries him, and he wakes up in the year 2546, where Atheism has completely taken over. Meanwhile, in the present, Mrs. Garrison has a severe problem with the curriculum making them teach evolution in school. That is until she meets the right man, who just might change her mind on the whole thing. This is the plot line that gives the episode it's namesake, but make no mistake, these episodes are mainly Cartman-based. In 'XII', Cartman is still stuck in the future, dying to get his hands on a Nintendo Wii. As for Mrs. Garrison, to say much more spoils way too much. Regardless, check it out though. They are by no means bad episodes, and as mentioned before, my opinion here tends to differ from the masses. I personally find these a bit overrated, though still good enough. #05 - The Return of Chef After Isaac Hayes left the show, due to disagreements on the episode 'Trapped in the Closet', Trey and Matt decided it best Chef be killed off for good, knowing he wouldn't come back. This is the first episode of Season 10, and picks up where a supposed "lost episode" left off (and no, it's not an episode you can find anywhere, it was just written this way). The recap covers Chef going away to join something called the "Super Adventure Club" in an effort to find himself. When he returns, the boys are happy about it, but notice his strange behavior. This comes from the fact that they had to dub older clips of his voice into the episode, making him make very little sense. His behavior eventually leads to Chef talking about his desire to have sex with the boys. They decide to check out this "Super Adventure Club" for themselves to see how they've affected Chef. Of course, they manage to find out that they're a corrupt group of child molesting explorers and have brainwashed Chef into thinking in the same way. The highlight of this episode is how they took old dubs of Chef's voice, and worked it around to make him sound like a pervert. It's disturbing, but I gotta say, it's creative. As mentioned before, this is also the episode in which Chef gets killed off (so to speak), making 'South Park' lack a little something from then on. But they do give him a sendoff as only 'South Park' can - totally violent, gory and over the top. #04 - Tsst Liane Cartman (Eric Cartman's mother) decides she simply doesn't know what to do with him anymore. He's far too out of control at this point, and even as the viewing audience, we wonder if there's any controlling him at all. She therefore turns to several experts, coming from various reality TV shows like 'Nanny 911' and the similar. However, Eric just ends up manipulating their minds so they do anything from leave in a huff to literally go psychotic. In one last effort, Liane calls Cesar Milan of 'The Dog Whisperer'. All the while, Eric tries his usual tactics to try to get rid of him, but Cesar simply treats him like he would any other dog - a vast part of it being ignorance and discipline. This whole process is extra funny to watch if you're anything like me and like to see Cartman get put in his place every now and then. There's even a scene in this where you basically watch him break and become docile and well-behaved. I won't give away too much here, but the episode also involves Liane developing a sort of love interest for Cesar. The punchline to this at the end of the episode, though pretty predictable, is still pretty funny. This is easily one of the best episodes to watch if you love Cartman's off the wall reactions to things. #03 - Manbearpig When VP Al Gore pays a visit to South Park Elementary, he wanrs the kids about something called "Manbearpig", which he claims to be "half man, half bear, half pig". The assembly pretty much ignores what he has to say, though, and go on with their lives. Through a couple of events and random visits, Gore is trying too hard to be friends with the boys. Eventually, Stan feels sorry for him in that he has no friends, and agrees to go to a Manbearpig meeting with the others. Here, Gore tells them that Manbearpig is hiding in the Cave of the Winds - a South Park tourist attraction. Reluctantly, the boys decide to help him on his futile Manbearpig hunt in order to humor him. This of course leads to a complete mess up on Gore's part, as he accidentally traps the boys in the cave by being an idiot. Much of the rest of the episode is the boys surviving, a rescue crew, and Gore's obsession with Manbearpig going on and on. This includes the running gag of "nobody takes me serial" (or cereal, however you wanna spell it), which became one of 'South Park's most quoted lines for a while afterward. I think my favorite thing about this is how Gore is portrayed a particular type that most of us know. He's the guy who you don't really like altogether, but he's lonely and sad, so you hang out with him out of pity. Meanwhile, there are several reasons not to hang out with him, but he doesn't understand why. It's not even that he's a bad guy, he's just annoying, stupid and clumsy. He was a fun enough character to use that they even brought him back for a couple of later episodes as well as 'The Stick of Truth'. #02 - Cartoon Wars, Parts I & II In Part I, we see two sides to the same story. 'Family Guy' ends up being a source of fear to the town, as they want to take the risk of airing an image of Muhammad through a two-parter. On one hand, the townspeople want to literally bury their heads in the sand, so as to say they were never a part of the problem. On the other, Cartman becomes surprisingly passionate about having the episodes pulled due to their racial insensitivity. Kyle, unbelieving in Cartman's sensitivity at first, gives in after Cartman gives a heartfelt speech. He then decides Cartman's right, and agrees to head to Fox to have the episodes pulled. Of course, Cartman has ulterior motives, aiming to cancel 'Family Guy' once and for all. In Part II, Cartman reaches the studio, where we are introduced to the 'Family Guy' writing staff. As much as I do enjoy 'Family Guy' for myself, I have to say that the gag they use for this is hilarious. Meanwhile, Kyle has been left behind after an altercation he has with Cartman at the end of Part I. He is, however, determined to stop Cartman from manipulating the studio executives, and getting the show pulled. Perhaps the best part of the episode IS the retaliation the Islamic government does make. Of course, you'll have to get through each of these episodes to fully appreciate it, but it's great. We also meet a character who is pretty obviously Bart Simpson, and it's funny to hear the "bad boy" dialogue between him and Cartman. This is mostly due to the fact that 'South Park' was pretty much the cartoon to raise the bar after 'The Simpsons'. It's truly a great two-parter for the show, especially if you're at all familiar with 'Family Guy'. #01 - Make Love, Not Warcraft Somehow I get the feeling that if this wasn't my #1 for Season 10, I was "doing it wrong". This episode is one of the most talked about in general, let along for a single season. And with Blizzard's actual help, they managed to make one of their five Primetime Emmy Award winners as well as a pretty damn solid tribute to 'World of Warcraft'.
The boys are all playing 'WoW' when a "griefer" (someone who plays against you online just to mess with you) comes along and kills them off one by one. Blizzard gets a hold of the information about this player, and claim him to "have absolutely no life". In other words, he's the single strongest WoW player out there. In order to defeat him, they have to give the "Sword of a Thousand Truths" to another high level player, but unsure of who to turn to. That is until they notice reports of Stan, Kyle, Kenny and their leader Cartman secretly leveling up to face this griefer. Meanwhile, this also acts as a great Randy episode. He comes into the episode as a noob, trying to get into the game, but treats it so seriously that things are "life or death" with him. Honestly though, whether you're into 'Warcraft' or not, this is easily one of the best, now classic, episodes of the show as a whole. If you DO love "Warcraft' on the other hand, then all that does is probably make the episode better. There are jokes in here for pretty much everyone.
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Honorable Mention - Ginger Kids The episode opens with Cartman giving a presentation to the class. In the presentation, he talks a lot of hate toward "ginger kids"; kids with red hair, pale kin and freckles. Kyle, being a redhead himself, decides that Cartman has gone too far with his hate speech, and needs to be taught a lesson. This is done by Kyle, Stan and Kenny breaking into Cartman's bedroom, and making him up to look "ginger", himself. When Cartman wakes up, he sees the resulting makeover. He then has to face the prejudices of his schoolmates, whom he convinced to hate "gingers" in the first place. Due to the prejudice Cartman is suddenly facing, he forms the "Ginger Separatist Movement". Of course, he ends up leading them not unlike Hitler would have, declaring the "gingers" to be a "master race" of sorts. I tend to enjoy this one as more of a "Cartman getting his" episode, and it does end with a pretty good punchline. By this point though, we've seen him take on the controversial Hitler role already, and it's just become a bit too much of his character. It takes me out of it just enough. Honorable Mention - The Death of Eric Cartman The episode opens with the boys waiting at Stan's house for Stan's mother to come by with some KFC. Once she arrives, she asks them to help with the groceries. Stan, Kyle and Kenny head out in an effort to make the process go fast, but Cartman stays behind and eats every piece of KFC skin, leaving the actual chicken behind. Kyle, Stan and Kenny decide he's gone too far, and choose to ignore him from then on. They even manage to convince their classmates to follow suit. Through a series of events, including people ignoring him, Cartman believes that the KFC skin killed him, and that he's become a ghost. Eventually, he runs into Butters, who doesn't ignore him as he doesn't know what the other kids have been doing. Cartman takes Butters as the only one who can see him, and uses him to try to make amends to the people he's wronged. Through a montage, we see some call backs to characters like Scott Tenorman and Sally Struthers. The episode is punctuated by some hilarity with Butters. He ends up just spilling the beans on being able to see Cartman, and he's taken to get professional help. Some of the tests you see him subjected to are actually pretty horrifying and make no sense, but his general reactions are hilarious. Of course, this all ends with a funny punchline as well. It's a great episode, and would easily make a #6 if this list went any higher. #05 - Die Hippie, Die I have to appreciate the fact that this episode is a big call-back to Cartman's hatred for hippies. It's something that's been mentioned enough in past episodes, but we've never really seen anything come of it until now. Another interesting thing about this one is that it's one of very few that portrays Cartman as a hero of sorts. In this episode, Cartman runs a pest control service. He goes door to door, checking the area for hippies in an effort to eradicate them. They are pretty much portrayed as cockroaches, as they're hard to get rid of, and slowly infesting South Park. Having studied hippies thoroughly in the past, Cartman, theorizes a massive infestation. This would come in the form of a music festival taking place in South Park, the likes of which the town has never seen. Meanwhile, Stan, Kyle and Kenny are informed by the hippies about corporate evils, and they end up joining in the hippies' cause. In a parody of 'The Core', Chef, Randy and oddly enough, Butters' mother, Linda all eventually assist Cartman in his mission. I can't help but laugh out loud at some of the "hippy exterminations", as so many of them react in such a stoned manner. It's pretty clever, and in my mind, one of the better Cartman-centric episodes. #04 - Best Friends Forever The new PSP is out, and Kenny is the first kid in 'South Park' to get one. However, he seems to have a lot of trouble giving it a rest. He's constantly playing a game called 'Heaven vs Hell', never really taking his eyes off the screen. Once he reaches level 60, in old 'South Park' tradition, Kenny is killed by an ice cream truck. The difference is that here, we see the aftermath for the first time (I think) since the movie. In a 'Last Starfighter' parody, it's revealed that God created the PSP in order to look for a "Keanu Reeves" (a chosen one). Kenny is needed by Heaven to fend off Hell's armies, using the video game he's become so good at. Upon accepting, Kenny is revived, but in a vegetative state. In Kenny's will, he begins to say what he wants done if he was ever in such a state, but the message is cut off. During this time, Cartman creates an elaborate scheme, claiming that he was Kenny's "Best Friend Forever". This is all in an effort to have Kenny's feeding tube removed so he can get his hands on his PSP. Meanwhile Stan, Kyle and Kenny's parents wage a media war against him, wanting the feeding tube to be left in. It's another great Cartman scheme episode, much like 'Kenny Dies', but less hidden as far as what Cartman's scheme actually is. By this point, Cartman is definitely, mostly a manipulative and villainous character, so nothing could surprise us anymore. I also just love the homage to 'Last Starfighter', and when we see the big climactic scene, it's quite a laugh. #03 - Trapped in the Closet Who can forget the infamous "Scientology Episode"? This was the episode responsible for making Isaac Hayes quit the show after eight and a half years of being perhaps the closest secondary character the show had. Since then, Hayes has unfortunately passed away, but he's still remembered fondly as Chef; 'South Park's general voice of reason. After taking a personality test, it's revealed to Stan that he's depressed, and that Scientology might be right for him. Using his bicycle savings, Stan pays to get the help he's told he needs. After a series of tests, Stan gets "high readings", and the President of Scientology deems him the reincarnation of Scientology's founder, L. Rond Hubbard. When a group of Scientologists surround the Marsh household, they seem convinced that this theory is true and have come to welcome Hubbard back. This includes Tom Cruise, who meets Stan in his room. Believing that he's talking to Hubbard, Cruise asks if he likes his acting. However, Stan tells him that his acting is just "okay", and Cruise locks himself in Stan's closet, pouting, and refusing to come out. The rest of the episode is about various celebrities attempting to talk Tom out of the closet, while Stan attempts to write a continuation of the Story of Xenu. Hayes left the show due to their insensitivity toward the religion of Scientology. This was a fine line, because a lot of people thought Scientology was kind of a joke when it became so seemingly mainstream. Despite his valid points, it's hard not to find this episode funny though. It was further nominated for an Emmy, and reached several lists as one of 'South Park's biggest achievements. So I suppose I wasn't the only one who found it to be well done. #02 - Two Days Before the Day After Tomorrow Stan and Cartman start the episode off, playing in a boat Cartman claims to belong to his uncle. While messing around, they end up losing control of the boat, and crash into the world's largest beaver dam, flooding the town of Beaverton. As one may imagine, this is 'South Park's answer to the Hurricane Katrina incident. However, its more a farce on people figuring out who is to blame for the disaster, and leaving actual assistance for the victims a secondary thought. "Global warming" ends up being the main thing to blame for the flooding of Beaverton. As Randy and other scientists look at their data, it's claimed that the full effects of global warming will be seen "two days before the day after tomorrow" (in other words "today"). Of course, most of this episode ends of being a parody of 'The Day After Tomorrow', which in and of itself has pretty ridiculous misconceptions of how global warming works. In other words, you're not gonna be outrunning severe cold, and locking yourself in a room where it can't get you thanks to a little fire. This is a very good Randy-centric episode, and he does a great job here of showing off his own stupidity. It's funny to watch things get so out of hand here, when all Stan has to do is fess up to what he did. Of course, Cartman spends the episode happy to be off scot-free. Once again, this episode ends on a hilarious note that highlights the overall stupidity and stubbornness of the adults of South Park. #01 - The Losing Edge This one's for all the Randy fans out there, as it's easily one of the best Randy-centric episodes. He ends up playing a combination of Rocky Balboa and that angry, obnoxious dad at any kid's sporting event.
It turns out that none of the kids on the South Park Cows actually enjoy playing baseball. Their only real reason for playing is based on their parents' enthusiasm for the sport, but they actually find it very boring. After the Cows win their final game, they become very enthusiastic at having the rest of the summer to enjoy themselves. However, coming first in their division, they are informed that they have to participate in the post season playoffs. As a result, the team discusses doing what they can to lose on purpose, as they really don't care much about playing and just want the break. The side plot to this involves Randy being a trash-talking dad, and it's where "I'm sorry, I thought this was America" comes from. The running gag is that he's constantly getting arrested after causing disturbances at the little league games. As mentioned before, the Randy story line heavily parodies 'Rocky'. He comes across an even more obnoxious father who calls himself "Bat Dad", and hesitantly challenges him. All the while, his wife Sharon keeps trying to get him to calm the hell down, and some of the dialogue between the two is just hilarious. It clearly shows us Randy living in his own little world while Sharon remains perfectly sane, trying to be a voice of reason. It's the perfect episode to watch Randy go, what I like to call, "Full Randy'. Honorable Mention - Woodland Critter Christmas Let's just get this out of the way right away; I always kinda found this episode to be on the overrated side. I'm not saying it isn't still a good episode, but to say it's the best of the Christmas episodes feels like a bit much. It seems to be a pretty common disconnect I have from other 'South Park' fans, so take my opinion with a grain of salt. The premise plays like some classic animated Christmas special, complete with rhyming narration. Stan comes across a group of woodland critters, all with meant-to-be unoriginal names like "Rabbity the Rabbit" and "Deery the Deer". They first ask Stan for help to put a star on their Christmas tree, to which he obliges. Later that night, they come to Stan's room and explain that Porcupiney the Porcupine is pregnant with their savior. Being that it's a sort of Mary and Joseph situation, Stan helps them out with what they need. I don't wanna give away too much for anyone who may not have seen it, but the rest of the episode is all about twists and turns, and truth be told, it IS rather well-executed. It comes down to personal taste for me, however. There's a lot about this episode I find funny and smart, but there's a lot of it I find cruel as well. This is opinion is generally followed by an "it's meant to be cruel", and that's honestly fair. Considering the biggest twist of the episode, I really can't argue that point. The truth of the matter is, I can't explain why I find this one so incredibly harsh when an episode like 'Scott Tenorman Must Die' made one of my Top 5's without spoiling the episode altogether. Anyway, it IS one of their strongest episodes despite what I think, so it deserves acknowledgement at least. Honorable Mention - Douche and Turd During a pep rally, the South Park Elementary School mascot gets protested against by PETA, due to it being a cow. PETA demans that South Park change their school's image. Disappointed with their choices, Kyle and Cartman come up with opposing ideas for joke candidates but disagree on whether it be a giant douche or a turd sandwich; a gag that would later be repeated with Season 20's portrayal of Clinton vs Trump. Stan, however, is distraught on his options once it boils down to voting for a douche or a turd. He is pursued by the masses though, as there's a misunderstanding that Stan might not understand the importance of voting. The truth is, Stan thinks it is important, but between a douche and a turd, it seems ridiculous. This whole premise is punctuated with the fact that people end up pressuring Stan to vote for the candidate they want. There's a lot of laughs to this episode, and I always kinda found myself lumped in with Stan when it comes to politics. It's not that I don't care, but when it comes to picking the "lesser of two evils", it does tend to be a hard thing to have to accept. That said, I DO vote based on personal opinion, so no lectures necessary. Honorable Mention - Awesome O This one almost made the list, as it's a pretty classic episode that centers on the duo of Cartman and Butters. This time around, though, Cartman totally gets his, and it's pretty entertaining to watch it all unfold. Cartman shows up at Butters' hosue disguised as a robot named AWESOME O,, claiming to help him out, be his friend and listen to his secrets. Butters reveals a lot of personal stuff, but just as Cartman is about to reveal himself, Butters mentions that he knows one of Cartman's most embarrassing secrets. Cartman asks about it, and Butters reveals that he has video footage of him dancing around, dressed up like Britney Spears, teasing a life-size cutout of Justin Timberlake. He intends to use it the next time Cartman decides to humiliate him. With this, Cartman realizes it'll get out upon his reveal, so he decides it best to keep the act up. The problem is, Butters believes he's his robot friend, and really doesn't let him out of his sight. It goes from Cartman having to sleep beside him, to Cartman starving and dying of thirst because, as a robot, he "doesn't have to eat", to Cartman having to go on vacation with him. It's just one of those entertaining situations that gets worse and worse as it goes on. I love Butters' naivety in this episode, as it's sort of what helps move the story along. Meanwhile, as much as I enjoy Cartman, there IS something to be said about watching him suffer for once. The beautiful thing is how it ends, which I won't spoil completely, but it's just another reason for me to route for Butters. #05 - The Jeffersons Some may not agree with my decision to go with this episode, as it involves Michael Jackson, just a few years before his death. This was mainly triggered by the infamous MTV interview in which it's more or less revealed that Michael was, in a word, odd. BUT that's kinda what I do enjoy about it. A father and son move into the neighborhood who call themselves the Jeffersons. The boys greet a boy named Blanket at the door upon heading over to see who has moved in. Blanket wears a paper mask to hide his face, and explains that they moved to South Park to escape city life. Mr. Jefferson (obviously Michael with a mustache) greets them as well, and takes them to the back yard where it looks like one big, fun carnival. The boys have a good time, but all the while Stan and Kyle realize that Mr. Jefferson is completely neglecting his son while he has fun, himself. Cartman being his selfish self fails to notice the same, and figures this to be pretty much heaven on Earth. It's an episode that totally pokes fun at Michael in all his weird glory, but it manages to tackle the issue of Michael being sorta selfish, himself. He shows love to his son, but he still wants to have fun, himself, because he missed out on childhood. A very valid point is brought up by Kyle at the end of the episode as well, and though it pokes fun at Michael, it doesn't REALLY make him a villain when it's all said and done, so much as a guy with a lesson to learn. Frankly, I'm just damn glad they didn't focus on his child molestation charges AGAIN. #04 - Goobacks In the year 3045, Earth becomes overpopulated and overcome with poverty. As a result, a man is sent back to present day (2004 at the time) to look for work. The idea is that the money he makes can be stashed in the bank and gain interest so that by the time his time comes around, the family will be well off. Because this works very well, several other future immigrants come to town seeking work. Due to their willingness to work for super cheap, they are given jobs very easily, laying many people off. This of course leads to the famous 'South Park' associated phrase "They took our jobs!" as it gets funnier and funnier with every mention. Nothing beats the time Stan says it though. One of the best moments from this season in my opinion. The episode serves as a pretty funny satire of illegal immigration, and the desperate ways we go about keeping our jobs. It clearly makes light of both sides of the argument, and it's a great example of the parents of South park getting stupidly out of hand. In case you wonder what a "Gooback" is, it's essentially the racist term for the future people, who always seem to enter the present through a portal that leaves them with a purple gooey substance stuck to them. #03 - Something Wall-Mart This Way Comes This whole episode serves as a farce on Wal-Mart's overwhelming power over us as a cheap retail company. When a Wall-Mart (in the episode it's 2 L's) is erected in South Park, the townspeople flock there to check out their bargains. Of course, Wall-Mart's bargains are so good that some of the local stores end up shutting down because they can't do business anymore. Eventually, several townspeople even end up working for Wall-Mart for a 10% discount on their already cheap products. This includes Randy Marsh, who is by far the best part of this episode. He ends up being so incredibly helpless against Wall-Mart's power that things get really melodramatic with him. It's easily one of my favorite Randy episodes. Anyway, soon, South Park becomes a sort of ghost town, and due to it's power, the townspeople decide they don't want it there anymore, burn it down, and see it pop back up again overnight. Eventually, Stan, Kyle and Kenny decide to do what they can to stop Wall-Mart. Meanwhile, of course, Cartman plots against them, attempting to do what he can to protect the Wall-Mart. It's a really fun episode made for just about anyone who has worked in retail, especially if they have been a part of Wal-Mart at some point (I'd imagine). #02 - The Passion of the Jew While the boys are playing 'Star Trek' in a minivan, Cartman and Kyle get into an argument about Kyle's Jewish heritage. As a result, Cartman dares Kyle to watch 'The Passion of the Christ', as it would prove to him that "everyone hates the Jews". Kyle sees it, becomes mortified, and it terrorizes his thoughts to the point where Kyle asks his synagogue about apologizing for crucifying Jesus. Angered, the members of the synagogue head to protest the movie. Meanwhile, Cartman forms a fan club for the portion of people who loved the controversial film. The people, of course, think they're part of something important that spreads the awareness of Christ dying for our sins. Cartman, on the other hand, takes this as an opportunity to lead them, going full Hitler against the Jewish community. And yeah, this is Cartman, so it gets pretty rough. In fact, it's referenced in future episodes about as much as references to 'Scott Tenorman Must Die'. But then there's my favorite part of the episode, Stan and Kenny checking the movie out. They claim it sucks, want a refund, and dub it a "snuff film". They make up about half of the episode, as they venture out as far as Mel Gibson's house to get their money back. Mel Gibson, himself, makes for one hell of a highlight in the episode as well. It's clever, it's risky, and in the end, the punchline is pretty damn funny. #01 - Good Times With Weapons This episode would most likely end up making my Top 5 of all time, I love it so much. At a county fair, the boys come across a booth selling authentic weapons from the far east. They want to purchase them, but are told they have to be 18 years old, at least, to buy them. They quickly make up a brutal sob story, though, and the booth owner gives in.
The boys have a great time playing Ninjas (which would be AWESOME to see as the theme for the third 'South Park' game if they make one) but tell Butters he can't join them. Feeling rejected, Butters dawns his alter-ego, Professor Chaos and acts as a villain to the other boys. That is until Kenny ends up throwing a shuriken (ninja star) directly into his eye. This is still one of the best laugh out loud 'South Park Moments' in my opinion, it still gets me every time. The rest of the episode plays as part ninja adventure, part emergency cover up situation. They even try to take Butters to the vet after the incident, dressed up as a dog, so as not to get in trouble by their parents. As you can tell by the corresponding picture, much of it is done in an anime style as well. And yes, once again, this is a "kids being kids" episode, which make up most of my personal favorites. I think perhaps the highlight of the episode is when the boys get into a fight, and some really badly "translated" song lyrics cue up. The song is very short, but it's called 'Lets Fighting Love', and I'm quite sure it can be YouTubed. Honorable Mention - Krazy Kripples I was debating on including this for a few reasons, not the least of which is that it's an episode where Trey and Matt really seemed to test their borders. It was as if they said "we need to increase our riskiness and raise the bar", so along came Krazy Kripples - an episode full of controversy, and another one I enjoy for it's sheer ballsiness. Christopher Reeve arrives in South Park (this was over a year before his death, mind you) to inform the public about stem cell research and it's benefits. Through it, the paralyzed man develops the muscle power little by little to get back on his feet. By the way, fair warning, the way it's done is hilariously disturbing and gross. In the meantime, however, Jimmy and Timmy are upset at Christopher Reeve taking all the attention away from them, as they were crippled at birth and not in an accident. They therefore attempt join the Crips (a real life and very dangerous gang who opposes another known as the Bloods) under the impression it's for cripples who were born that way. The episode, between dangerous gangs and the controversy of stem cell research, is easily one of their riskiest moves. It's an episode so controversial that the other kids opt to stay clear of it at all costs through a running gag, which honestly just makes it more funny. One might make this the "test episode" for the series' newcomers, as it probably doesn't get much riskier than this altogether. Honorable Mention - Cancelled This episode could have easily made the Top 5 based on it's whole idea, alone. However, due to it's rather irritating ending involving Jewish stereotype aliens getting drunk and overly sexual with annoying voices... I know it's 'South Park' and to expect certain things, but I personally just can't stand that whole bit. Otherwise, though, the episode is brilliant! It starts off the exact same way the 'Cartman Gets an Anal Probe' (the pilot) does. Eventually the boys click in to their strange deja vu situation, and recall the giant satellite dish that was implanted in Cartman's ass. With the help of Chef, they discover that the satellite is beaming some sort of message, but it's hard to decipher. Eventually, the boys are all abducted and separated from Chef. Chef heads for more help in deciphering the hidden message (with he aid of a Jeff Goldbum-like character named "Jeff"), and the boys run into an alien who explains to them in a really interesting and cool twist what Earth is actually all about. It's one of those episodes that truly had a great, smart, original idea. For that, the episode gets a lot of credit. Unfortunately for myself, though, I just hate those aliens at the end. Call it a personal thing, I dunno. It's even surprising to me, considering all the worse stuff that 'South Park' has done before or since. #05 - Casa Bonita Kyle announces to the other boys that as a special birthday treat, his mother is taking him and three friends to Casa Bonita. Kyle's selection, however, is Stan, Kenny and Butters since by now, Kyle has pretty much established he actually hates Cartman. Obviously, this doesn't go over well with Cartman, who is otherwise obsessed with the restaurant. For the rest of the episode, Cartman does what he can to manipulate Kyle into letting him come in Butters' place. Eventually, he gets through to Kyle with his fake kindness, and is told he go if for some reason Butters can't make it at the last minute. This, of course, leads Cartman to take some drastic measures. This is another episode that sort of highlights two characters at their best, namely Cartman and Butters. We see a great example here of how Cartman plain and simply cannot be trusted no matter how he acts. He also provides the episode's simple punchline at the very end. Butters' in the meantime, allows his imagination to run away with him as usual, as Cartman plants some dark ideas in his head. #04 - All About Mormons This is an episode that I don't think I enjoyed quite as much as many others did. It's very often one of their most praised episodes, and it feels likely that this was the lead into the famous 'Book of Mormon' musical. It all starts when a new kid named Gary comes to South Park Elementary. Gary is unusually perfect in nature. He's super polite, does very well in school, and is even goo at sports. Of course, as a result, all the kids just wanna see him get beaten up for being so smug (even though he's actually very kind-hearted). Stan goes for it, but Gary's kindness messes with Stan's mind, and soon he is invited to Gary's house for dinner. This is where Stan learns of Gary's Mormon faith, and the story of Joseph Smith is told in sections throughout the episode. I have no real idea about the REAL Mormon history and how much of it this episode got right, but it's my understanding that most see it as pretty ridiculous. The beautiful part about this episode is actually the somewhat unexpected punchline at the end. It's the kind of joke that saps the audience in the face with "to you this is stupid, but to others, it leads to a happy and healthy lifestyle". It's a nice little punctuation at the end of an episode in which you're fully agreeing to the silliness of it all. A well-executed episode if nothing else. #03 - It's Christmas in Canada As a Canadian, myself, let me just admit that I tend to find 'South Park's view on Canada freaking hilarious. It started with the flapping heads and the Canadian accent, and the development continues through this episode. The tradition of Canada being a sort of low-grade place continues through 'The Stick of Truth' as well, but I think this was where the real development of it started. Ike's real parents arrive from Canada to take him away in accordance with a new Canadian law passed by the Prime Minister. The law states that all Canadian children living in America are to be returned to their birth parents. With that, Kyle seeks out the help of the other boys to head to Canada to get the Prime Minister to change the law. The boys are reluctant, but follow. Cartman insists that they be back in time for Christmas presents, or else he and Kyle fight. Stan, on the other hand, is ironically worried about missing out on a Christmas adventure. Along the way, the Canadian gags continue, which includes a complete farce on 'The Wizard of Oz'. This is complete with there being only one road in Canada, munchkin-like characters, Scott (from 'Not Without My Anus') acting as the Wicked Witch, and the three characters met along the way, a Mountie who rides a sheep, a French Canadian mime, and a Newfie. #02 - Grey Dawn This episode just ends up being a lot of fun, and actually a bit of a farce on the zombie genre (at least in my eyes). It all starts when a bunch of the senior citizens in town are noticed to be driving rather recklessly. They're so bad, that things kick off with a memorial service for nine people who have died as a result. Eventually, the senior citizens get their licenses taken away as a safety precaution. Not about to give in, and maintaining his stubbornness, Grandpa Marsh takes to driving again anyway. He is, however, arrested by Barbrady. It's an episode that seems to want to illustrate how stubborn senior citizens can be with their rights, but it also acts as a cautionary tale for the younger generations not to treat them like children. Okay, so old folks have a cuteness to them, but I feel like I always understood how frustrating for them it can be to be talked down to like a child. The rest of the episode unfolds as a sort of senior citizens revenge story, in which the American Association of Retired Persons (AARP) gets involved. In other words, just imagine a bunch of old folks wearing army helmets and packing heat. It's like something out of 'Python'. But again, I just enjoy how it's one where you can sort of route for either side; stop the seniors from driving around dangerously and risking lives, or stand up for yourself if you're being constantly condescended to. #01 - Raisins May I recommend this episode to anyone who may be struggling through a break-up. By the end of the episode, it becomes abundantly clear that break-ups are NOT the end of the world.
This one starts out with Wendy officially breaking up with Stan. Throughout the episode, Stan reminds us just how pathetic we can become after having our hearts broken. He tries to send her poetic messages through friends, offers grand romantic gestures, etc. When none of it works, he joins the Goth kids (in their first appearance) in all their dark, non-conformist glory. Meanwhile, Butters has some problems of his own. He befriends a Raisins waitress (think disturbingly young version of Hooters) who leads him on to think he's something special, and he mistakes it as an actual relationship. Long story short, this episode also serves as a friendly slap-in-the-face reminder that some women definitely use their charms to get the most out of you. The episode is punctuated, however, with the one scene that solidified Butters as quite possibly my favorite 'South Park' character - and it remains to this day one of the best insights on how to handle your heartbreak. Honorable Mention - Freak Strike This really does manage to be not only a great Butters episode, but also a great Cartman episode. It all begins when the boys are sitting around the TV, watching an episode of Maury Povich. As they see a variety of "freaks" come on the show, they learn that they get a prize at the end of the show. In an effort to get their own prize from Maury, the boys get the Trekkie geeks from the 'Fourth Grade' episode to help. They make a fake scrotum to attach to Butters' chin, send him on the show, and Butters wins the prize for himself. Cartman, still wanting his, calls in with his own "fake freak" idea. They tell him they are looking for "out of control teens" instead. Of course, this leads to the now famous teen trash Cartman, know for his line of "Whatever! I do what I want!" It's a very funny episode overall, and Cartman is probably the best part about it. But without him, the episode is almost forgettable, despite it's humor. I think it's just one of those episodes people love, but I just think Cartman has a few better moments. Honorable Mention - Professor Chaos / Simpsons Already Did It In previous episodes, Butters had become the replacement Kenny through a process of elimination done by Stan, Kyle and Cartman. In 'Professor Chaos', he is fired, goes home, and creates his evil alter-ego of the same name. His goal is to spread disarray and chaos around the world, but he does so as only a kid would think to. Things like swapping orders at a local resaurant, or attempting to flood the Earth with a garden hose. Meanwhile, Stan, Kyle and Cartman seek out a new fourth friend in the style of a reality TV show. The decision, along with a few other major questions from the episode, is presented in a cliffhanger which is answered immediately. I always took this as Trey and Matt making up for messing with us about who Cartman's father was back between Seasons 1-2. In 'Simpsons Already Did It', the plot continues despite the cliffhanger questions being answered. "Professor Chaos" continues to try to bring chaos to the world, but is constantly harassed by his sidekick, General Disarray (Dougie from 'Two Guys Naked in a Hot Tub') saying how the Simpsons have already done whatever he's planning. The subplot to this one involves Cartman ordering sea monkeys, under the impression they would take him away to a magical underwater kingdom. I always found the Professor Chaos elements to this two-parter great, but the subplots are relatively weak and forgettable. #05 - Red Sleigh Down While everyone else in the world has fallen in love with 'Woodland Critters Christmas', this one's actually my favourite Christmas episode of the series. Up to this point, they have been relatively innocent, but I swear this episode is Trey and Matt's answer to something like 'Die Hard' - only in the sense that it's a Christmas/Acton plot. It's otherwise clearly taking from 'Black Hawk Down' and 'Three Kings' (fitting, no?) The plot has Cartman finding out that he's been such a bad kid. So bad that he basically has to do the best thing he can possibly think of in order to get presents. Not even curing Cancer would do the trick. His big idea - go spread Christmas cheer to the people of Iraq. With the help of the other boys, they head to the North Pole to find Santa and make it all happen. However, on the mission, Santa is shot down and taken hostage, and that's when the episode takes a brilliant dark turn. In their desperation, the boys seek out Jesus to go save Santa, and it turns out that Jesus is actually a total badass. The episode is complete with a rather unexpected and surprising death. But what tops the episode is the tail end of it when, spoiler alert, Kenny comes back. I won't say how it happens, but it's kinda hilarious. #04 - My Future Self n' Me While the boys are playing in the woods, they find a joint some of the older kids left behind. No one wants to touch it to throw it away, however, because of all the PSAs they've seen on TV. Stan eventually gets the job done though. Later that night, during a bad lightning storm, a strange man comes to the Marsh house. He claims to be Stan from the future, and tells stories about being in Juvenile Hall and being addicted to various drugs. Stan figures it all started when he touched that joint, and decides to be clean and study hard. Stan asks Butters to tutor him, and upon going to Butters' house, he realizes that he too has a "future self" living with him. Soon enough, Stan uncovers the truth behind these future people, and, without saying too much, eventually it leads to Stan and Butters seeking revenge. I can't help but find the future people pretty damn funny through the episode, and there's a great gag at the end involving Cartman. Unfortunately, it's just one of those episodes where if I told too much of the plot, a lot of the humor is taken away from it. But check it out if you're a fan of the show. Stan and Butters actually end up making a pretty good contrast here. #03 - Child Abduction is Not Funny When Tweek has a run-in with a known child abductor, the parents of South Park become increasingly paranoid for their kids. With every fresh news report, the parents take on a new idea in order to protect their little ones, as they get increasingly more and more ridiculous. In the meantime, the parents have Mr. Lu Kim build a wall in order to keep strangers out of town. In a very cartoonish subplot, he has to spend the whole time fending off an army of Mongolians. What I enjoy about this was that they straight up showed off in the beginning of the episode how Lu Kim is very much an admitted stereotype. Cultural insensitivity issues aside, however, the best part of the episode has little to do with Lu Kim's wall. If anyone were to ask me to show them an episode of 'South Park' that illustrates the stupidity of the parents of South Park, it has to be this one. You just kinda watch them slowly get dumber and dumber as the episode unfolds, and their paranoia peaks. #02 - Asspen If you like 'South Park', and you have a particular love of 80's cheesiness, this is the episode for you! In an attempt to get away for a fun time, the boys parents take them all to Aspen for a ski trip. At this point, the fourth boy replacing Kenny is Butters. Once there, the parents find themselves trapped in time share meetings where there seems to be no escape through the whole episode. As funny as that is, it's just the side plot. The rest of the episode acts as one giant 80's movie stereotype. Stan is harassed for no reason from a ski bully named Tad, and ultimately finds himself facing off against him. For those of you who remember 'Team America' and the classic 'Montage' song, you can see it here first. Complete with that 80's montage, it takes place at a ski resort, it's a "save the rec center" story, the bully is over the top, and even the music that plays here and there consists of horrible versions of those 80's pop songs we all love. It's an episode I highly recommend to anyone looking for something a bit different when it comes to 'South Park', especially since it connects to nothing in continuity. It's practically 'South Park's answer to a bad 80's film. #01 - The Return of the Fellowship of the Ring to the Two Towers Before I get into it, I should note that there is a bit of continuity between episodes that involves Kenny's (now dead "forever") soul existing within Cartman. It's not a bad idea to preface this episode with 'A Ladder to Heaven' in which we see how this works.
As far as this episode goes, however, it wins me over with the whole "kids playing like kids do" scenario. After watching 'Fellowship of the Ring', the boys get into it and start role playing. Stan's parents send them on a "quest" to bring the tape to the Stotch's so Butters can watch it. Unknowingly, however, the tape was swapped with a pornographic film called 'Back Door Sluts 9', known to be the "dirtiest porno of all time". With all of the scenarios in place, the porno transforms Butters into a Gollum-like kid, who craves his "precious". The tape itself, if not obvious, takes on the role of the One Ring from the film. In the episode's own way, it plays out sort of epically, as it mimics so much from the three movies. Otherwise, it's just a lot of fun and somewhat nostalgic to the times you may have role played like this as a kid. It's definitely a personal favorite. Honorable Mention - Towelie Aside from the introduction to 'South Park's biggest stoner character, this is just a good one to watch for a laugh at how one-track a kid's mind can be. It all starts after Cartman finds a used tampon in Stan's bathroom, and trying to figure out what it is, Stan's Mom comes in, mortified. In an effort to get the boys to stop talking about it, she buys them a gaming system called the Okama Gamesphere. Of course, the boys intend on playing it as much as humanly possible. Duing gameplay, however, a really random site enters the room in the form of a walking, talking towel called "Towelie". He warns them that they need to bring a towel whenever a subject involving water is brought up, and, as mentioned before, he's a total stoner. They more or less ignore his existence, however, as they are so caught up in their gaming. Eventually, the Okama Gamesphere is stolen from them when they reveal to a strange man that they know who Towelie is. It all leads to a very convoluted story about what Towelie is, why he was made, and the boys get caught in the middle of the government and the company that made him, Tynacorp. But the hilarious catch is that they just plain don't care. Throughout the whole episode all they wanna do is play their Gamespehere, taking no interest in the many strange things going on around them. It's a great episode for anyone who appreciates a good joke on the gamer lifestyle. Honorable Mention - Super Best Friends When David Blaine visits the town of South Park, he wows the masses with his street magic. This includes all four of the boys, and they soon find themselves in a cult of "Blaintologists". Soon, however, Stan leaves, as he feels increasingly more disturbed by the cult. Kyle refuses to join him on the run, though, so Stan seeks out the help of Jesus. Jesus faces off against David Blaine with his miracle of loaves and fish, but in a hilarious twist, his magic is no match for Blaine's. He therefore calls on the help of what is evidently South Park's "Justice League", "The Super Best Friends" - a group of religious figures including Muhammed, Buddha, Moses, Joseph Smith, Krishna, Laozi and, just for giggles, "Sea Man" (essentially South Park's version of Aquaman). Together, they team up and face off against Blaine. This episode just barely fell short of the list, only due to my personal opinions on the following episodes that did make it. I love that it plays into the whole classic superhero idea, complete with a narrator. The big joke in this one even ends up being Trey and Matt making fun of their own animation. Once in the cult, the boys get their heads shaved and are given uniforms, so they all pretty much look exactly the same. The exception being Cartman. #05 - Kenny Dies This episode is... weird... For whatever reason, Trey and Matt decided to kill off Kenny "once and for all". I always just took it as them running out of ways to kill him, or else just getting tired of the gag. He would eventually be brought back in 'Red Sleigh Down', and I hope that's not a spoiler, but... c'mon, that episode aired in 2002. Anyway, this time around, it was a terminal illness that did the job. Kenny remains alive through most of the episode, but sick in bed. All the boys have a hard time with this, and it actually gets pretty dramatic. I mean, when you see Cartman crying on Kyle's shoulders about the situation, it kinda yanks the heartstrings. Cartman, himself, ends up lobbying for stem cell research after he finds out what it can do for Kenny. And this time around Stan is almost the "bad guy" because he simply can't see Kenny in such a state, even though Kenny really wants to see him before he dies. I mean, it gets pretty dark. As one can only imagine, this all leads to a giant end-gag, but throughout the episode it's the most convinced you'll ever be that Trey Parker and Matt Stone did a dramatic episode. To me, it's probably the best gag they've done on their audience since the whole fiasco about finding out who Cartman's Dad is. #04 - Cripple Fight When the four boys, along with Timmy, join the Mountain Scouts, they find out their Scout Leader is Big Gay Al. As expected, the boys all enjoy themselves. The exception is Timmy, who is no longer the special handicapped person in town. This is the episode that introduces Jimmy, the handicapped comedian boy. Upon finding out that Big Gay Al is their Scout Leader, many of the parents demand that he be ousted from the Scouts. They fear that he'll be a "negative" influence on their boys, and may turn them gay. It therefore becomes an episode less about the actual cripple fight and more about another fairly in depth look at gay rights, and the paranoia straight people have about it all. But don't get the wrong idea, there's still a fight between Timmy and Jimmy, and it's actually pretty hilarious. Not because they're handicapped, but because it's such a hardcore and dirty fight. In a pretty hilarious eye-opener for the people watching this who can relate to the parents, while Al is fired, a man named Mr. Grazier takes over. As one may expect, he ends up being a pretty horrible person overall, but according to the parents, he's just what they need. It can be a rough episode to watch for some, but I do find it sends a good message in the end that some people need to wake up on the whole gay "issue" altogether. #03 - Butters' Very Own Episode For those of you who know me, it's probably no surprise that this one made my list. I freakin' love Butters! He's a lovable loser, he's always throwing his foot into his mouth, kinda naive, he's not very well liked overall, but the kids are still cool with him, hell, he just reminds me of me in a lot of ways. In his very own episode, Butters is excited about his parents' anniversary, as they are going to Bennigan's, which is his very favorite restaurant. When his Dad leaves the house, his Mom asks him to tail his father in order to find out what he's getting her for the special occasion. However, as Butters follows him around, he naively witnesses him go into several gay establishments without realizing what he's seeing. He reports back to his Mom his findings, and she is mortified. Now unhinged, Mrs. Stotch takes Butters and attempts to drown him by driving him into a river, and locking him inside. Of course, Butters survives the ordeal, however, and takes it upon himself to head back home. The funny thing is knowing that he doesn't even realize his Mom tried killing him. It's definitely one of the darker episodes in 'South Park', but Butters himself seem to be the balance in this. He's just this sweet, innocent, naive little boy who wants his parents to have a happy anniversary. Even though things are right in front of him, he just doesn't get it. And that's kinda what I love about Butters - he lives in his own happy world, and not a damn thing gets him down. #02 - Osama Bin Laden Has Farty Pants This was SO close to being #1, but based on pretty much one thing, it just barely fell short. But don't get me wrong, the episode is otherwise brilliant. This was right after 9/11; the original air date being November 7, 2001 - not even a full 2 months after the attacks. The people of South Park are scared, patriotism runs rampant, and gas masks were being worn for fear of anthrax. The opening few seconds alone make the episode well worth it for it's time. The boys end up donating a dollar to four Afghani children, who in return send a goat. No one will let them keep the goat, though, and insist it gets returned to Afghanistan. However, only military is flying over there, so the boys sneak it through a military base with the cover that the goat is, in fact, Stevie Nicks. They soon find themselves caught on the flight, and end up in the middle of the war torn country only to soon get kidnapped, and come face to face with Osama himself. Eventually, what I truly love about this episode is seen. Cartman does for Americans the same thing Bugs Bunny and Daffy Duck did back in World War II - provided ballsy entertainment involving flat out making fun of Osama Bin Laden - Public Enemy #1 for the time. Getting back to why it's #2 and not #1 though is a simple matter of it officially being dated. Since then, too much has happened, including the execution of Osama himself. Its a great episode for it's time, and at the time I probably would have made it #1, but this is sixteen years later - a significant gap in time. Still though, it's one of the finer episodes of the show in it's entirety. #01 - Scott Tenorman Must Die Why put this one in the #1 position? Especially over the 'Osama' episode? Well, this one still withstands the test of time. It's still an episode I show people when they wanna know how dark 'South Park' can get. In that case, there really isn't much to top it, before or since.
At this point in the game, it's pretty well established that Cartman is the least liked kid in South Park. People are just sick of his attitude by now, and even though they still act as friends, they know Cartman needs his comeuppance one of these days. He pretty much gets it when an older kid named Scott Tenorman plays a prank on him involving pubes. I don't wanna say too much, but things kinda do a back and forth with Scott always outsmarting Cartman in the end. However, it turns out Cartman gets pissed off just a little too much and plots the ultimate revenge on him. And guess what, it's not killing him... I'd say it's worse... much, MUCH worse. In fact, it would be referred to from then on as one of, if not the most terrible thing Cartman ever does on the show. What I love so much about it is that upon first seeing it, I remember actually being kinda mind-blown at just how far things went. I didn't even laugh about it, it was just plain shocking. It was there that I realized 'South Park' has set a whole new bar. It may have been there slightly beforehand, but it clicked for me here. It was almost like the episode was Trey and Matt saying "we aren't afraid to go to the darkest of places." It set the controversy level up for times to come, and pretty much officially labeled Cartman as one of the primary villains of the show. If you do decide to watch it, do so expecting the shock at the end. Even for a show like 'South Park' it's extreme. Honorable Mention - Fat Camp This is more of an episode to watch just for a good laugh. It's pretty basic altogether, but it's something audiences may question - what would happen if you tried sending Eric Cartman to Fat Camp? The result ends up being pretty funny, and somewhat what one would expect from a kid like Cartman. I won't spoil it too much for you 'cause it's pretty funny, but he manipulates the necessary people as only Cartman can. Just another step toward true evil (remember that for next season's list). As far as the other boys go, the side story here involves Kenny becoming a "prostitute". Starting with the classroom offering him some cash to eat a manatee spleen, it continues on to eventually have him become a star. Eventually, he ends up on the Howard Stern Show with Johnny Knoxville and Tom Green, to give you some idea of just what kind of star he becomes. It's a good one, but there's just not enough to it to make it. Honorable Mention - A Very Crappy Christmas This one very nearly made the list, and probably would have if it was... well... just a better episode overall. It involves the boys going into the sewers to investigate why Mr. Hankey didn't show up on Christmas morning. They soon discover that Mr. Hankey has a family, and because of this, he's been dealing with various family issues - not the least of which is a raging alcoholic wife. The boys then take it upon themselves, with the help of Hankey's children, to somehow bring Christmas spirit back to South Park. It starts with failed caroling, and evolves to the idea of making an animated Christmas card. The animated Christmas card in question is 'The Spirit of Christmas', which was the original animation by Trey Parker and Matt Stone that lead to the idea of 'South Park' in the first place. So that's a really cool Easter Egg for anyone interested in the show's history. However, when all said and done, the episode just isn't that memorable to me. Of all the Christmas Specials, I'd probably put this one on the lower end of the list, despite the interesting Easter Egg. #05 - Fourth Grade Right around the middle of Season 4, Trey and Matt said "these dudes need to develop a little", so they aged them by one year, gave them a new teacher, and started bringing the background characters to the foreground. The whole idea was great for keeping the show fresh without ruining what people loved about it. They get their new teacher, Mr. Choksondik, and they give her a hell of a time as she tries to be a proper teacher. Frustrated on not being able to get through to them, she visits their former teacher Mr. Garrison, who had fled to the mountains after being fired when he was accused of trying to solicit sex from Cartman (seen in 'Cartman Joins NAMBLA'). Meanwhile, the boys reminisce enough about third grade and how good it was. They seek out the help of the town's tow most superior 'Star Trek' geeks in order to make a time machine. I won't say what the machine ends up being, but it yields hilarious results. It's a great episode to kick of the "new and improved" 'South Park'. #04 - Something You Can Do With Your Finger Before the boys enter Fourth Grade, one of their final Third Grade adventures has Cartman convincing Stan, Kyle and Kenny to form a boy band. This stems from a dream Cartman has in which he gets a taste of what fame must be like. With this, Kyle points out that most boy bands out there have five members. Several of the students go through an audition to become the fifth member, but only one manages to nail it. And it's not Randy, as the accompanying picture may suggest. Actually, that brings me to my next point about the episode. Aspects of it make it a Randy episode, and perhaps the first time we see him go, as I like to say, "Full Randy". He doesn't want Stan to join the boy band due to his own tortured past of being in one, himself. It's a fun episode, and the 'Fingerbang' song the boys sing will likely get stuck in your head once you finish watching. #03 - Helen Keller the Musical By this point in the game, Timmy has been established as perhaps the biggest new name in the show. Why do people love him so much? Because he's just that lovable! He's always happy, having a good time, clearly enthusiastic, and you can tell he's a good kid despite the fact all he can seem to say is his name. So, it makes sense to make an episode in which you seem to genuinely care what happens to him. The fourth graders are made to put on a play for a 'Thanksgiving Extravaganza' at their school. The selection is 'The Miracle Worker' - the story of Helen Keller. When Butters mentions the kindergarten class has the best show he's ever seen in the works, however, the class decide to up their game. The biggest idea they have is to make it lean more towards the theme of Thanksgiving by changing Helen's dog to a turkey who can do stunts. Timmy helps to pick out the turkey, and falls in love with a disabled turkey, calling him "Gobbles". Meanwhile, Cartman has also decided to head the play, change it into a musical, and bring in Jeffrey Maynard, who once played the lead in 'Les Miserables'. Eventually, a much fancier turkey is also brought in through Maynard, named "Alinicia". Because of this, there are assassination attempts on Gobbles as we see Timmy doing what he can to protect him. All in all, it's actually a pretty sweet episode with a fairly surprising (even for 'South Park') ending. But don't worry, all the humor you want is here, and it includes Timmy's discovering of his new word "Gobbles". #02 - Timmy 2000 'Timmy 2000' serves as our proper introduction to the new handicapped character, Timmy. In an attempt to find out what his handicap is, Mr. Mackey decides he has ADD, and he is given Ritalin taken off homework (by the way - NOT how it woks!). With the idea of getting no more homework, the boys claim they have ADD as well, and it's easily given to them. On one side of the story, we see how the boys react to the calming effects of Ritalin, as it makes them boring and creepy. Cartman ends up seeing little pink Christina Aguilera monsters as well. Eventually, the adults join in the trend as well, leaving Chef the only one in town not on it. It plays as a sort of 'Body Snatchers' scenario. In the meantime, Timmy, not taking his medication, comes across a garage band. They hear how Timmy talks, and allow him to be the lead vocalist for their new band 'Timmy and the Lords of the Underworld'. The people of South Park fall in love with the band, but on the sidelines, Phil Collins tries to break them up due to seeing how the audience laughs at Timmy's antics on stage. It's an episode that gives me a good laugh, especially having been on Ritalin once, myself and understanding it's zombifying effects (which, granted, are extreme in this case). #01 - The Wacky Molestation Adventure This is another easy #1 for me, as I've always considered it my favorite episode of Season 4. Much like 'Rainforest Shmainforest', I didn't even really need to watch it again for it to end up here. The title may throw some, however, so allow me to explain.
It all starts when the boys get tickets to a concert featuring a band called the 'Raging Pussies'. Everyone makes up alibis to make sure they can go, except for Kyle, who foolishly asks their parents who very predictably say "no". In trying to figure out how to get to go, Kyle even manages to achieve something deeply political that ought to be impossible. I won't say what it is, but it's funny stuff. He's still denied, however, and Cartman suggests he call the authorities and tell them his parents molested him. That way, the parents are out of the way, and he can go. However, having no parents around rules just a little too much, and all of the kids follow Kyle's example. Some time passes, and we see a couple named Mark and Linda drive into town, looking for directions. To make a long story short, to know that I'm a sucker for the episodes that focus on the kids playing some adventure game, or as I say "just being kids", this is the most extreme and even somewhat horrific example of that. It's essentially post-apocalyptic mixed with the idea of 'Children of the Corn'. It's easily the most fun I had with an episode from this season. It's ten times funnier if you get the 'Children of the Corn' references throughout. It also has one of my favorite Kenny deaths, but that's just me. Honorable Mention - The Succubus In the 'Succubus' episode, the boys are threatened by a girl who Chef is seeing, and falling in love with. Afraid that she's going to steal Chef away from them, they do some research only to find that she's a "Succubus" - some sort of evil being sent from Hell to suck the life out of men. It's a good episode that explores the whole idea of romance stealing a best friend away. However, I hand it to 'South Park' for avoiding it being the best friend who's in trouble. The idea seems all the more threatening when it's your mentor who's in trouble. What really makes this episode stand out, though, are Chef's parents. If you've ever hear the term "tree-fitty", chances are it came from here. Chef's parents consistently go on about the Loch Ness Monster and his asking for that small amount of change. It's a great episode, and kinda hard to keep off the initial list, but I just found the ones I chose more impactful. Honorable Mention - Two Guys Naked in a Hot Tub I might as well mention here that this is probably the only time a 2-3-parter will be separated on the list. The reason being, these episodes don't really connect to each other, save the fact that it's three different perspectives taking place on the night of a meteor shower. I like to simply call it the 'Meteor Shower Trilogy'. In the first of them, Stan is made to go to a party with his parents. It plays on the idea that when your parents went to a party where you didn't know anyone, you would be forced to hang out with some kids you didn't know/like. Meanwhile, the title gets it's name from Randy Marsh and Gerald Broslovski "experimenting" in the hot tub by masturbating in front of one another. What follows is another good first Randy moment where he's just uncomfortable with Gerald through the whole episode. This is pretty much the point the audience is officially introduced to Butters and the lesser known Dougie; the duo who would soon become Professor Chaos and General Disarray. Pip is in this one too, and I often considered it a sort of "passing of the torch" from Pip to Butters as the "lovable loser character". It's funny, but nothing spectacular. Honorable Mention - Cat Orgy Part 2 of the 'Meteor Shower Trilogy' is one that holds a special place in my heart, and it was actually a bit of a coin-flip between this and 'Jewbilee' for my #5 spot. So make no mistake, this one just missed it by a hair, for reasons I'll explain later. 'Cat Orgy' is another example of something like the 'Clubhouses' episode in that it reminds me of kids just being kids. The concept involves Cartman's mom heading out to the party mentioned in 'Two Guys Naked'. As she heads out, Shelly Marsh comes in to be Cartman's babysitter. I haven't really mentioned Shelly yet, so let me just say she's the portrait of an overly abusive older sister. The idea of her vs Cartman for run of the household lends itself to the unstoppable force meeting the immovable object concept. The results are hilarious, mostly because this is probably the first time Cartman ever gets put in his place. The namesake of the episode comes from the side story involving Cartman's cat being in heat. She heads out seeking a mate, and comes back with several at a point where the house is empty. The cat orgy scene alone is pretty damn funny, but still pretty lowbrow. #05 - Jewbilee The last of the 'Meteor Shower' trilogy makes the list solely based on the fact that it was the only of the three that was truly adventurous. The other two end up being relatively grounded stories, whereas this one pressed some controversial buttons as only 'South Park' can do. It starts with Kyle getting ready for Jew Scout Camp, when Kenny comes to the door, looking for someone to hang out with that evening. Kenny eventually gets to go with Kyle to the camp. Meanwhile, one of the Scout leaders is intent on resurrecting an evil spirit called Haman to be the new Jewish Leader. As for Moses (the thing from 'Tron' there in the picture), he is to be imprisoned in a conch shell. On the other side of camp, we have Shlomo, the Squirts leader. This side story follows what Ike's doing, but focuses on Shlomo as a nerdy, cowardly leader who doesn't wanna be there - especially when the Squirts constantly get kidnapped by bears. It's definitely a weird episode, and it plays with the Jewish religion to the point of controversy, but so much of the dialogue here is just laugh out loud hilarious without cutting too deep. Fair warning, may offend some. #04 - Korn's Groovy Pirate Ghost Mystery In the third Halloween episode, the cast is joined by Korn. A local radio station ends up sponsoring a "Halloween Haunt", featuring the band. Priest Maxi, however, doesn't like the ideas of Halloween or metal music, so he leads a protest. The boys end up getting scared by a bunch of fifth-graders at the Halloween Haunt, using "pirate ghosts". In an attempt at revenge, Stan decides it best to dig up Kyle's deceased grandmother to bring back and return the scares. Meanwhile, Korn poses as pretty much the Scooby-Doo gang. After seeing the pirate ghosts, themselves, they take it upon themselves to solve the mystery of the pirate ghosts. Eventually it becomes members of Korn teamed up with the the South Park boys, which in it of itself is a pretty cool idea for the time. One very important note about this episode is that it's actually where the song 'Falling Away from Me' debuted! #03 - Are You There God? It's Me, Jesus In 'South Park's version of a Millennium episode, Cartman kicks things off by informing the boys that he's hit puberty due to having his first "period". This happens to Kenny as well, and deciding he needs to fit in, Kyle lies about it. In actuality, Cartman and Kenny are bleeding from their anuses due to a bad stomach virus. Having not received his "period" yet, Stan is shunned by the other boys and left alone. Meanwhile, the residents of South Park believe that the new millennium marks a special enough occasion for Jesus to bring his father to Earth. Believing that the Earth isn't ready for his appearance, however, God opts out. This contrasts with Stan praying to God for his period. Both being let down, eventually they both learn the important lesson that if God did everything for them, their life would have no purpose. I, myself, am agnostic, but the big lesson to be taken away from this is a valuable one nonetheless - we can't rely on any sort of higher power to live our lives for us. We must inevitably face our own problems head on. It's one of the deeper episodes, whether you're religious or not... but, there IS a big reveal as to what God looks like here, so just be ready for the unexpected. #02 - Chinpokomon I daresay that if this was any other person's list for the same thing, this would most likely end up at #1. For me, it's damn close. The episode involves the overall popularity of 'Chinpokoon' and obviously farces the impact 'Pokemon' has on kids. Throughout the episode, the kids collect the Chinpokomon, play the Chinpokomon game, and even end up signing up for a Chinpokomon camp. Being so into it, the boys don't realize they are being brainwashed. They are told that upon becoming true Chinpokomon champions, they will be able to "destroy the evil power". It turns out that Japan actually has a much more sinister scheme up their sleeve, using the boys as brainwashed soldiers. Being the kid who never got into Pokemon, this one holds a special place in my heart as I often feel like I'm seeing it as an "outsider" of sorts. I relate more to Kyle in the episode who just can't keep up with the ridiculous trend. I love seeing just how brutal the whole brainwashing scheme gets, as I feel like it might as well be that bad in reality. With the invention of 'Pokemon Go', one can even watch this episode again with new appreciation. And I'll be fair, I have also been brainwashed by popular toys... as a matter of fact, LEGO still has it's claws dug into me. #01 - Rainforest Shmainforest It's simple, this is just one of my favorite all-time episodes. It might even make my Top 5 episodes as a whole. Certainly Top 10. It's made even more special by the appearance of Jennifer Aniston playing the choir teacher, Ms. Stevens.
When Stevens visits South Park Elementary, she introduces her choir "Getting Gay with Kids" and explains their cause of saving the rainforest. The boys make fun of them, namely Cartman, and as punishment they are sent with the kid's choir to South America to see the rainforest first hand. The whole time, Cartman provides some of the best comic relief we've seen him do up to this point. He and Miss Stevens contrast beautifully - especially when they manage to get themselves lost. To hear Jennifer Aniston's voice say such harsh things to Cartman throughout the episode is nothing short of hilarious. If you get the chance, you MUST watch it uncensored for her big climactic scene. I have always found this episode to be completely underrated. It's barely ever mentioned when reviewing the entire show, and if it is, it tends to get the push to the back of the line. There have definitely been better episodes before and since, but I highly recommend this one for a good, controversial laugh - again, uncensored it you can manage it, if only for Aniston's "freak out" scene. Honorable Mention - Gnomes Again, mostly just because I saw it too many times and it got stale, this one didn't quite make the list. It is one of the better episodes of the season to be sure, and full of good laugh, but it just wasn't quite enough to make it. In order to save Mr. Garrison's job, the boys are made to write a paper on current events. They are teamed up with Tweek (introduced here), and Tweek's father develops a grand scheme to use the kids to his advantage. Tweek's father tells the boys they should write the paper on how big corporations come in and take over small businesses. Eventually, they are taught about business by a small race of Underpants Gnomes that only Tweek can seem to see as everyone else is ignorant to them. It's a great episode - check it out regardless of it not making the list. Honorable Mention - Chickenlover The episode that sparked the phrase "RESPECT MY AUTHORITA!" is, to me, only half-awesome. The main story is centered on Officer Barbrady and his illiteracy. He is sent back to South Park Elementary to learn how to read so he can capture a wanted criminal; a man going around South Park molesting chickens. Though the episode doesn't have a whole lot going on other than Officer Barbrady showing off how dumb he is, it's not without it's greatness either. Things take off when Barbrady allows the kids to help by making them honorable deputies. Stan, Kyle and Kenny help Barbrady try to learn how to read so he can catch the perpetrator. But of course, as we all know, Cartman takes his "authorita" to the next level, and can't get enough of whacking people in the shins with his nightstick. Again, a great episode overall for some, but for me it was only half-way there, and other episodes were just better overall. #05 - Chef's Chocolate Salty Balls For some reason, this was always one episode I've held close to my heart. It's likely being a fan of film, and all the jabs South Park takes at what a film festival is actually like. But there's even more going on here, and it actually has very little to do with Chef's balls. A film festival comes to South Park in an attempt to seek out a small mountain town to move to. The main plot-line involves the boys finding Mr. Hankey coping with a polluted environment due to all the festival food. When Kyle tries to talk some of the festival attendees into going home because they're slowly killing Mr. Hankey, and the idea is twisted into another movie to make and show at the festival. The best parts of the episode, I think, come from the movies themselves. They consist of quite a few stereotypes when it comes to independent film, including over the top artsiness, sexuality, and of course... gay cowboys eating pudding. #04 - Ike's Wee Wee 'Ike's Wee Wee' consists of two parts... Take that how you may, but what I mean are the two stories happening within the episode. First off, we have the boys trying to rescue Kyle's baby brother Ike from his circumcision. According to a panicked Stan, a circumcision means that Kyle's parents are gonna chop off Ike's penis. It's also here that we find out Ike's an adopted Canadian. I believe it's also the first indication that in the South Park Universe, Canadians have the flappy heads. But what really and truly makes the episode is the side plot, involving Mr. Mackey. This is the one with the famous "drugs are bad" line in which Mackey loses his job after passing a sample of weed around the class room and someone pockets it. The whole drug subplot is hilarious, and balances out the circumcision plot to such a degree the episode could have just as easily been called "Drugs Are Bad, M'Kay" #03 - Prehistoric Ice Man It's kinda funny looking back on this episode in particular, as the big joke in it is that the "prehistoric ice man" is from 1996. At the time, he had only been frozen for just over two years. But now it's been almost twenty since the episode aired. The jokes referencing 1996 were a bit funnier at the time due to the fact that everything was still relatively recent. But I digress. The episode features Stan and Kyle stumbling on a man who got frozen inside an ice cave. They bring him to the town's attention in hopes of some sort of reward, but they only get to name the "creature". Stan wants to call him Gorak, but Kyle wants to go with Steve, and it eventually culminates into a rivalry between two best friends. Meanwhile, Dr. Mophesto takes the ice man in, thaws him, and discovers as mentioned before that he's been frozen since '96. The real treat comes when Steve/Gorak escapes and Cartman tries to help hunt him down with the aid of the Crocodile Hunter. #02 - Merry Christmas, Charlie Manson In 'South Park's second Christmas episode, the boys head to Cartman's grandmother's house for Christmas; Stan only able to tag along due to running away after being denied in the first place. After being there for a little while (and getting introduced to the overall hilarity of Cartman's family), the boys come across Cartman's uncle Howard breaking in after escaping prison. Accompanying him, of course, is notorious mass murderer, Charlie Manson. Howard and Manson end up taking the boys to the mall to meet Mr. Hankey, and Kyle ends up seeing the mall Hankey for the fraud that he is. Meanwhile, we see Manson's softer side come out as he obsessively watches whatever holiday special he can. This of course makes for an uncomfortably light ending of the episode involving a fully reformed Manson, teaching us about the importance of family. But of course the real reason to love this episode has nothing to do with Manson, himself. It's that Cartman, including little Elvin, whom Eric manages to render comatose by hitting him with a stick. It's family dysfunction at it's best. #01 - Clubhouses Call me crazy, but I have to give this one a lot of credit for providing us with a couple of firsts. Although that statement is, I think, highly debatable, I ask you to bear with me on this.
The plot involves Stan wanting to build a clubhouse with Kyle so they can play Truth or Dare with Wendy and Bebe. Cartman and Kenny end up competing with some pretty damn funny results. With this, I sort of claim this to be the first time we see "kids doing kid things" without something really crazy going on in the background. The only real subplot to this involves Stan's parents getting a divorce, and Stan's new stepfather doing that typical asshole stepfather thing. With the divorce, however, I boldly claim this episode to be the first real "Randy" episode. Sure, he's a big deal now and everyone loves him, but he was still just Stan's dad back in the day; a straight man for the most part. Things are subtle here, but I think it's the first time we see Randy go to some sort of unnecessary extreme just because it's in his head that he should. But regardless of whether anyone agrees with me on these "firsts" or not, it's still a great episode, and one of the funniest of the season. Honorable Mention - Cartman's Mom is a Dirty Slut What kind of person would I be if I didn't at least make mention of the famous 'Cartman's Mom is a Dirty Slut' episode? Being one of the more famous episodes of Season 1, one may wonder how it didn't make the list. The episode brings to light the fact that Cartman has no father, and he ends up going on a journey to find who it could be. But, being that he was conceived at a "drunken barn dance", his father could be one of several people. This is part one of a two-parter (or three-parter if you count Season 2's 'Not Without My Anus' gag episode), and I believe to this day the only cliff-hanger episode 'South Park' has ever done between two seasons. The main reason it didn't make the list, however, was that I frankly just got tired of it. Once Season 1 hit syndication, this one seemed to be on ALL the time! There's also a running gag in it that plays around with what I believe is supposed to be the theme from 'Titanic' that gets a bit annoying. But admittedly, it is still one of the better episodes of the first season. #05 - Starvin' Marvin In 'South Park's Thanksgiving episode, the boys send money to the Christian Children's Fund after seeing a commercial hosted by Sally Struthers. The main reason, however, isn't to save one of the starving children, but get their hands on a special sports watch. An Ethiopian boy is delivered instead of the watch, however, and the boys decide to take him in as their friend, calling him "Starvin' Marvin". After taking him to show and tell, Mr. Garrison insists the boys call the Red Cross and have him returned to his home. Upon calling, the Red Cross comes to Cartman's house looking for Marvin, but Marvin tricks them into taking Cartman instead. Meanwhile, Dr. Mofesto has genetically engineered a race of killer turkeys, and there even ends up being a sort of war between South Park and the turkeys to hilarious results. #04 - Big Gay Al's Big Gay Boat Ride 'South Park' seemed to be out on an overall mission to be controversial. It still is to this day, but there were areas back in the late 90s that were still a little bit taboo to tackle. Although there were enough shows tackling the matter of homosexuality back then a bit more subtly, 'South Park' decided to do it loud and proud. The episode features Stan with his new dog Sparky. It turns out Sparky is a gay dog, and this bothers Stan as the other kids (namely Cartman) make fun of him for it. Sparky then runs away, feeling unwanted. Stan finally finds Sparky, however, at Big Gay Al's Big Gay Animal Sanctuary, where gay pets can go live in peace. The end lesson of the episode, of course, is that it's okay to be gay. Though perhaps surprising to some, I remember this one being significant at the time for steering me in the right direction with maturity on the subject matter. #03 -Mr. Hankey the Christmas Poo Okay, so the fact of the matter is, this is an episode that features a singing, dancing piece of poo named Mr. Hankey, who has as big a Christmas spirit as you can imagine. Kyle seems to be the only one who can see him, and it's passed off as Kyle trying to cope with being Jewish at Christmas. This episode marks the first time that songs were fully featured, including 'Lonely Jew on Christmas' and of course, the ever-famous 'Kyle's Mom is a Stupid Bitch'. The latter became popular enough that the 'South Park' movie features an extended version of it. In many ways the episode is crude toilet humor, but in many other ways it has everything to do with the ridiculous amount of offended people there seem to be around the holidays. The school's Christmas play suffers from parents getting angry and rearranging things to make it non-offensive, and the payoff is just hilarious. So, though the episode features a singing dancing poop, it's actually one of the deeper episodes of the first season. #02 - Cartman Gets an Anal Probe We didn't get Comedy Central when I was 15, so we didn't manage to catch any of 'South Park' in time for it's August 13 start date. However, after about a month, we saw the show advertised for Canadian company Global TV. Of course, my brother being 17 and I being 15 HAD to see this new level of obscene humor. The episode simply enough involves Cartman getting probed by aliens with some sort of communications device. While Stan and Kyle insist that visitors came down and abducted him, Cartman plays it all off as them just trying to scare him. Kyle's brother gets abducted, however, and Stan and Kyle try to work together, using Cartman, to communicate with the aliens and get his baby brother Ike back. It was pretty much the funniest thing we saw at the time, and the episode gets bonus points for being the only episode fully animated using construction paper cutouts; a painstaking process to be sure. #01 - Pinkeye After a Russian Space Station crashes into Kenny, he is taken to the morgue. It's there that two irresponsible workers spill Worcestershire Sauce into the embalming fluid, making Kenny a zombie.
The episode unfolds with some hilarity, as the boys treat Kenny like there's nothing wrong (probably because he dies all the time). They all go trick or treating together as Kenny keeps feasting on people, and the other boys just pass it off as strange behavior, getting annoyed at the lack of candy. However, they eventually figure things out with the help of Chef, and it turns into one of the gorier cartoons you'll probably see for it's time. 'South Park' may not do Halloween very often, but when they do, they have a tendency to pretty much nail it. This was the episode of the season EVERYONE talked about at school - even more so than the Pilot! I'm happy to say, it still holds up. Even if zombies are kinda overdone. |