Where do I start when it comes to how much I actually loved this movie? I guess I'll go with my all-out opinion on its director, David Leitch. With such solid titles as 'Bullet Train,' 'Deadpool 2,' 'Atomic Blonde' (which more people really need to check out), and the perhaps less appreciated, but super fun, 'Hobbs & Shaw.' I love this guy's style as an action director, and when he works with the right people, he can create something that takes you back to what blockbuster entertainment value used to be about. For this movie in particular, Leitch reconnects with writer Drew Pearce ('Hobbs & Shaw') and brings in co-writer Glen A. Larson, who's best known for his television writing on resurrected shows like 'Battlestar Galactica,' 'Magnum PI,' and 'Hawaii 5-0.' I wanna give this trio a lot of credit here, because it feels like they've delivered something here that just about anyone can enjoy. It's funny, it's action-packed, it's charming, and it's unique in that it's an underdog hero film about that unsung hero of film that is the stuntman. Said stuntman here is Colt Seavers (Ryan Gosling) who works in Hollywood as a stunt double for action star Tom Ryder (Aaron Taylor-Johnson). He has an off-screen romance with a camerawoman named Jody Moreno (Emily Blunt), loves his work and is living the dream. That is until one day, a stunt goes terribly wrong, Colt injures himself severely, and he abandons his career, leaving Jodi behind. He takes a job as a valet, in the meantime, parking cars with style for the rich and snobby. One day, Colt gets a call from producer, Gail Meyer (Hannah Waddingham) with the news that Jody is directing her first film, wanting Colt to join the production in Sydney, Australia. Colt jumps at the opportunity, despite being hesitant, but soon finds out why he was really brought in - to use his stuntman skills to find Tom Ryder, who has disappeared. His absence marks the film's cancellation, and he's needed back on set for it to go on. Not wanting Jody's film to fall through the cracks, Colt agrees, and the film picks up from there. When considering the film as a whole, there's so much I admire about its execution. One of the biggest details for me is that you have the ex-couple here throughout the movie, but their dialogue isn't just a bunch of bickering back and forth because for some reason people think that's funny. The few times they do get into any kind of fight, it's nothing overboard or stupid, and it's generally padded with real humour. For anyone who has seen this, the bullhorn scene is the perfect example of what I'm talking about. All that aside, it's always admirable to see some action with less CG and more genuine stunt work, and this movie is full of that. Some of the stunts end up being pretty unique, as well, my favourite being a bit of street surfing, which one can also catch a bit of in the trailer. There's even a long credit sequence here where they take you behind the scenes to see the real stuntmen at work on the film, which is admirable, as that's what the film is all about. I have to further credit it for being directed by a stunt coordinator. It's a great, unique idea. I can admit that at the end of the day, the film as a whole may end up somewhat predictable for some, and we've definitely seen the general plot of the famous person going missing and the unlikely hero(es) having to find them. But it's the execution of things I really admire here. It sort of stands as proof that in all honesty, a PG-13-rated action movie can still be a whole lot of fun. On a persoal level, I really loved what they came up with here, and it's bound to be on my "favourites" list of 2024. This is one I can recommend to the masses, so go have fun with this one if you haven't yet! 5/5
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Here we have yet another high-octane, balls-to-the-wall action revenge flick that follows the ideas of 'Monkey Man' fairly close. Therefore, I will probably be making quite a few comparisons between the two, as they each tell almost the same story (what little story there is to tell), but execute them in such different ways. For as enjoyable as 'Monkey Man' was, though, based on personal taste, I have to say that the execution of what we have here is far more up my alley, and I definitely liked this a bit better. For me, the idea of a revenge film that tries to reach the bar 'John Wick' has set is a bit of a tired concept. I do tend to have fun with them, but at the same time, its understandable that people might be getting sick of them. Hell, even seeing this movie almost paralleling 'Monkey Man' upon its release, even I said "another revenge film?" However, upon seeing the trailer for this, it added a couple of little details that managed to draw me in. It was clearly made for fun as opposed to heavy drama, it seemed to be influenced mostly by video games, and the narration of H. Jon Benjamin added a cherry to this revenge sundae of a movie. An unnamed city is run by the corrupt Van Der Koy family; artistic wannabe, Gideon (Brett Gelman), the harsh and heartless Melanie (Michelle Dockery), her equally heartless husband, Glen (Sharlto Copley) and head of the family, Hilda (Famke Janssen). An annual event the family hosts known as "The Culling" chooses twelve seemingly random victims to be murdered on live television for entertainment, suggesting the ideas we have of what the Colosseum in Rome once was have resurfaced in this dystopian future. One might also compare the ideas here to 'The Hunger Games' for a more modern take. One day, a boy we only ever know as "Boy" (Cameron & Nicholas Crovetti), his little sister and best friend, Mina (Quinn Copeland) and their mother (Rolanda Marais) are brought to the town square, and Hilda executes both Mina and her mother in preparation for The Culling, leaving Boy for death, deaf and mute. Eventually, Boy is found by an unnamed Shaman (Yayan Ruhian), and to make a long story short, the Shaman trains Boy through the years so that he can follow through with his revenge on the Van Der Koys for killing his family in cold blood. As a result of Boy's inability to speak or hear, he has created his own inner monologue (H. Jon Benjamin) whose voice he took from his favourite arcade game he used to play with Mina. He has also learned to read lips, which yields some pretty hilarious results when he can't see the lips moving clearly. There are a few moments here when nonsense is uttered because of improper lip reading, and with my love of random humour, it really just adds to things for me with a fun and, in my opinion, creative idea. Boy also constantly hallucinates Mina, who seems to be trying to help with on his mission, offering advice and perhaps a bit of a conscience. As mentioned earlier, there's a lot here that could be compared to 'Monkey Man'. Aside from the basic revenge plot, 'Monkey Man' has a similar lead name with "Kid," they both feature a funny sidekick type, here being Andrew Koji as Basho, and Sharlto Copley shows up in both as a despicable character. As far as which is better, it will all be a matter of taste, and it feels like it reflects the time of disaster movies in the late 90s when there was two of something a lot of the time, like 'Volcano'/'Dante's Peak' or 'Armageddon'/'Deep Impact'. Despite quality of either, you'll end up picking one that speaks to you a bit more. In the case of 'Monkey Man' vs 'Boy Kills World,' the big selling points for me on 'Boy' being "better" include much better fight choreography, much less shaky cam and the fact that it takes itself less seriously and almost feels like parody. It makes its heavily game-influenced execution known from the get-go, and reminds me of other non-video-game-based movies that make for good video game movies, like 'Scott Pilgrim.' To top things off, the blood is nice and over-the-top, almost adding to the absurdity of it all. While 'Monkey Man' may be preferred by some, I can say honestly that I had more fun with this one. 4/5 This is gonna be another one of those films in which I can recognize it as a solid movie for the right audience, but I'm not altogether sure that I am that audience. I've never been a fan of the "political thriller" genre, and it's often because I have a hard time wrapping my head around politics and all of the complications that lie within. The other side of it is that I tend to find them incredibly dry, and just take them as not being "for me". However, I can say with all honesty that 'Civil War' is an interesting spin on the subject matter. One can view the film's overall execution in a few different ways, reading into some sort of deeper political meanings. It can be seen as a cautionary tale about what to expect in our future if America ends up on the wrong path. But a lot of people also seem to see it as a heavy-handed exercise in shock value, considering a lot of the brutal imagery depicted within the film. But if I'm honest, my takeaway had very little to do with anything political at all, and the true thrill of the movie is in following our leads; all battlefield reporters who end up on the front lines of a slew of danger in order to deliver hard-hitting true stories to the nation. The idea here is that America is in the midst of its second Civil War between a US government run on a dictatorship, and various regional factions who are fighting back. It all opens with the President (Nick Offerman), now in a third term, who paints an instant portrait of what America has turned into. Enter our lead, a famous war photographer named Lee Smith (Kirsten Dunst) who we see doing her job to a disturbing degree, but we can still sympathize with her when she rescues an aspiring photojournalist named Jessie Cullen (Cailee Spaeny) from certain death. Lee, along with her friend and associate, Joel (Wagner Moura) plan to go to Washington to try to get one last interview with the president in before the city is taken. They are joined by Lee's mentor, Sammy (Stephen McKinley Henderson) and, unbeknownst to Lee, Jessie, who wants to follow in Lee's footsteps and become a pro. The thing is, in order to do that, Jessie will have to make herself come face to face with all sorts of torment, death, destruction and people who would just as soon shoot you as look at you. And it's all for the best photos. Throughout their journey to Washington, the foursome find themselves caught in the middle of a lot of the aforementioned danger, but as Lee looks after Jessie and tries to keep her out of danger, she simultaneously hints that the danger is where the action is in photojournalism, and Jessie gets better and better at the whole thing as the film unfolds. My takeaway from the film is more about the imminent danger that photographers put themselves through for a paycheck, and it helps us get a bit of insight into their brutal personalities. We've all seen a video or know of a story in which a reporter asks the victim of a disaster how they feel, and we've all had that same reaction of wanting to knock the reporter out for being so insensitive. This is not a movie that will change anyone's mind on that perspective, but it will give deeper insight into what it takes to be one of these people. You learn that in order to do this it takes a cold heart, but also quite a bit of bravery, and a lot of it is to spread the word to the masses about how terrible things have gotten in a situation. The film also shows us that these photojournalists do help where they can. But it still doesn't do a hell of a lot to make me like them. I had a hard time knowing how to feel at the end of it all, because without spoiling anything, there's a bit of a surprise ending. It doesn't really paint these people as heroes or villains, which is something I usually like, but the depth of these characters didn't offer much, despite a few solid performances that I can't really deny. In the end, I take it to be a bit of a thinker, and something to talk about, but I also don't know what else to say about it. I really think everyone's takeaway will be different. 3/5 I love a good revenge film, as several of my readers probably know by now. It's all about being able to route for the downtrodden, the "little guy," or victims of senseless circumstances. For me, 'John Wick' has the bar set, and set pretty damn high, plowing his way through four movies, each with something fairly unique to offer. Since the release of the first 'JW' (which set that bar), revenge films have still been solid, but not quite the same because, hell, you just do NOT mess with someone's puppy dog! Nevertheless, it's still one of my favourite sub-genres of action, as they tend to allow the viewer to get inside the head of whoever is victimized and seeking their revenge. For as many as I've seen before, this one hits particularly hard for me, and probably will to anyone else who has a strong relationship with family. It leaves me with mixed emotions. I'd be hard-pressed to think of a revenge plot that I could get more behind (puppies aside), yet I'd be lying if I said I didn't have a few nitpicks about the movie's overall execution. Kid's (Dev Patel) revenge plot here is aimed mainly at the corrupt Yatana police chief, Rana Singh (Sikandar Kher) and corrupt guru Baba Shakti (Makrand Deshpande). When Kid was a... kid, living a happy life in a quaint Indian village alongside his family, Singh and several others, ordered by Shakti, drove his family out of the village, killing some, and Kid has pretty much devoted himself to revenge since. He makes his money at a grungy, bare-knuckle boxing club as a masked fighter, paid to take dives by his boss, Tiger (Sharlto Copley). In the meantime, in order to get close to Singh, Kid will need to infiltrate an exclusive luxury brothel called "Kings," run by Queenie Kapoor (Ashwini Kalsekar). He gets himself a job in the kitchen and befriends Alfonso (Pitobash), who ultimately helps him climb the ladder so that he can get closer to Singh and Shakti, not only to avenge the family he lost in the raid on his village, but to free the exploited girls in this brothel as well, namely Sita (Sobhita Dhulipala), whom he also befriends, and appears to be one of the more abused and taken advantage of out of the girls. Concerning Kid's family getting driven out of their village in such a brutal manor and the victimized girls of this brothel, the desire to see Kid succeed in this mission of his is pretty high. Kid's a very easy character to route for, especially considering how much patience and effort he puts into his mission. What I do like about this is that, unlike John Wick, Kid is sort of an "every-man" who needs to learn and train his way through things. There's something more relatable about that, and for that reason, this feels like there's a bit more heart put into things. Having said that, let's get into some of the problems I had with things here. Again, a lot of it is me being nitpicky about things. The biggest thing here is that shaky-cam action, which I have a hard time with. I wanna see what the hell is going on, not feel like I'm falling down the stairs, and there's a lot of shaky-cam action to this movie. However, the film's atmosphere is also very rough, raw and almost dirty, so that kind of messy action also sort of makes sense for the feel of things. I'm not mad about it or anything, but shaky cam isn't really for me these days. The only other thing I can say about it negative is that there's a couple of moments where the viewer might ask "what happened with this character?" Not that it creates plot holes, but some of the characters I liked in this (including a dog who thankfully survives this movie) kinda just get left behind after a while. In the grand scheme of things I can probably think of a lot of better revenge flicks, but there's really nothing particularly bad about this in any way either. 'John Wick' still has that bar set for me, and for as good as this was, it still didn't quite reach. If only the shaky-cam fights were smoother. 3/5 Hollywood has given us more than a fair share of crossover movies that include a "vs" in their title, including this particular franchise. But I have to give it up to the MonsterVerse here for not only having the big, epic wrestling match between two celebrity monsters, but also bringing them together as a tag team. I've said it before and I'll say it again; these movies just work better if you watch the monsters' story lines unfold as though it was something Vince McMahon dreamed up. As far as this series has gone, it has been a fun ride so far. But considering how this movie unfolds, and the films that preceded it, this franchise kinda blew its wad already. Godzilla has already fought a good chunk of his big monster enemies, including the main event that was 'Godzilla vs Kong'. So for as cool as it is to see these guys team up, the truth of the matter is, the "villain" they go up against left a lot to be desired, and it sort of feels like things have taken a monstrous step backwards. But don't worry, this title doesn't come bereft of any solid monster-on-monster action. Picking things up three years after the last film took place (bringing us up to circa 2027 here), the concept of Hollow Earth has been revealed as fact, and Kong has been spending his time down there in search of more of his kind; Hollow Earth being the old home to many "Titans" or "MUTOs" (Massive Unidentified Terrestrial Organisms). Meanwhile, Godzilla stays on Earth's surface, fending off other big baddies like a giant crab named Scylla, and maintaining order between monsters and humans. These fights probably kill thousands in the process, but more on that later. A Monarch outpost within Hollow Earth picks up on a mysterious signal, which seems to be affecting Jia (Kaylee Hottle) on the surface with creepy dreams and hallucinations. Just to recap, Jia is the sole survivor of Skull Island's Iwi tribe after a natural disaster wiped them out. She lives with her adopted mother, Monarch researcher, Dr. Ilene Andrews (Rebecca Hall) and is able to communicate with Kong, using sign language. Jia's visions begin to worry Ilene, so she begins to assemble a crew including Titan veterinarian, Trapper (Dan Stevens) and podcaster for the conspiracy-minded, Bernie Hayes (Brian Tyree Henry) to head to Hollow Earth to figure out what this signals all about. Godzilla soon begins to act almost irratic because of this signal, attempting to absorb all the radiation he can for whatever threat may be coming. Meanwhile, within Hollow Earth, Kong discovers a secret that suggest that he may have found the rest of his kind, with the help of a young ape who was probably put in the movie just for cutesiness, Suko. And yeah, Suko's cute and all, but he's also a bit of an asshole. Kong has to keep him in line quite a bit, and it's often pretty funny to see how it plays out. One paritcular fight scene had me laughing out loud, and it's something you'll know when you see it. What the signal ends up coming from, however, is fairly anticlimactic, and it leads us to the big baddie of the film, Skar King, another giant ape who uses a reptile-like Titan named Shimo as both a weapon and a mode of transportation. I have to admit that this irks me just a little bit, while other much cooler monsters are briefly glimpsed, but quickly tossed aside, like the aforementioned Scylla and another named Tiamat, who is essentially an underwater Chinese dragon and should have made for a much bigger adversary than it was presented as. Going back to what I mentioned about destruction probably killing thousands, I've said it before, but one should probably just treat it as the old game 'Rampage'. Destruction is just a part of it. Something like a superhero movie feels different in that they're "heroes" who come across as careless. Titans, on the other hand, are giant animals who act like giant animals, so to me, it's more forgiving here. This chapter was definitely not the best of the franchise, but I still had fun with it, and I have to appreciate that they kinda go all-out here with some of the silliness. It's no 'Godzilla vs. Kong' with a cool big reveal, but it's fine for what it is. 3/5 To this series credit, I can say with all honesty that I find it to be altogether pretty solid. And right off the bat, I'll tell you that this instalment may have been, altogether, my least favourite of the bunch. But it's still a lot of fun, and carries on Po's (Jack Black) story even further, just when we thought '3' might very well be about as far as Po could get, becoming a full-fledged "Dragon Warrior" and Grand Master of Kung Fu, becoming Master Oogway's successor. It's a "happily ever after" ending to things, and I didn't entirely expect much more from it. I won't go into very great detail on Po's development here, and the lessons and takeaways the three previous films give. For more on that, head over to my "Gearing Up" page for reviews on all three. Back to the point, however, it seems as though that "happily ever after" ending followed through, as we pick things up with Po being a hero to the Valley of Peace and bathing a little bit in his celebrty status which he also uses to help his adoptive goose Dad, Mr. Ping (James Hong), and his biological Dad, Li (Bryan Cranston) open a new and improved noodle restaurant. Soon, however, Po's sensei, Master Shifu (Dustin Hoffman) comes in, as usual, to drive the plot forward. Even though we may have thought Po's development couldn't go much further, it seems there's just one more thing he has to do, and that's to name a successor, as Oogway did, seemingly not to long ago with him. This will also mean passing down the mantle of "Dragon Warrior" to whoever it might be, and that's not something Po is entirely ready to do, illustrating quite plainly that for as much as Po has gone, he still has a bit of growing up to do. But this time, he will not have the Furious Five to help out, as they are each off on missions or just living their respective lives in different ways. Auditions are held, and the fighters are impressive, but Po's attention goes to a thief fox he catches in the act named Zhen (Awkwafina), instead. And with word of Tai Lung (Ian McShane) returning (the villain from the original film) demands Po to check it out, he uses the opportunity to bring Zhen along and teach her a thing or two along the way, generally having to do with attitude as opposed to fighting skills, which she shows she has. We soon find out that the actual culprit is a Chameleon named... the Chameleon (Viola Davis) who has the ability to shapeshift and use the abilities of Kung Fu masters she has bested. The Chameleon's motivation in all of this is to get her hands on Po's staff (which he received from Ooogway in the Spirit Realm in the previous film) which will giver her the ability to open the Spirit Realm and steal even more Chi (again, refer to 'Kung Fu Panda 3') from the deceased masters. Now it's up to Po to stop her with the help of his unlikely apprentice. In the meantime, there's a sidequest involving Mr. Ping and Li going after Po because they worry he might not be able to pull his mission off, and to that degree, it's a little more of the same. Ping has always been a it of an annoyand with that, and now Li's doing the same thing. I have a few other little nitpicks here and there, but they are nitpicks. For example, this is another animated movie that does the thing where we see a group of adorable, puppydog-eyed kids who ultimately become little terrors, which is something I tend to find fairly cliche at this point. But at the same time, it is one of those cliches I can put up with for a chuckle. I also missed the Furious Five in this, but of course, I do understand their absense. They weren't necessarily needed, and to be fair, it is quite a cast, just between those five characters. Again, these are minor nitpicks. I think the biggest takeaway from this is that at this point, 'Kung Fu Panda' should probably finally come to an end with this. It may be my least favourite of the bunch, but it's still surprisingly enjoyable if maybe a little, tiny bit stale after a 16-year run. Thankfully, the films have been spread far enough apart, however, which adds to the enjoyablity of it all. Don't flood us with things, make us want things. All in all, this is a super solid series of animated movies that provide themes on growth, acceptence, being an all-around good person, and even finding one's path in life. I can highly recommend it for anyone with some growing to do, and that includes some adults! 3/5 I should probably make things abundantly clear again about how I feel about 'Dune' in general. It's not really my cup of tea when it comes to things as a whole. I can't really explain why, it just never truly struck a chord for me as much as other things like 'Star Wars' did. Still, it has my respect as a great story (at least what I've seen from these two movies, as I've never read these books), one that established itself well before so many like it, and above all else, I still think of it as a breath of fresh air between overexposure to things like superheroes. 'Dune' feels much more as though it's meant to be the next big epic three-parter adapted from classic writings since 'Lord of the Rings'/'The Hobbit', and so far, it's succeeding very well. About 99% of anyone I talk to even remotely about these movies seem to be pretty blown away by what writer/director Denis Villeneuve has accomplished, changes from the book notwithstanding, as per usual with things like this. For yours truly, I've really been enjoying them for what they are, but I don't truly see myself coming back to them until the next chapter is about to release. Before getting into things here, however, it should probably be noted that some pretty heavy spoilers lie ahead for the first movie, so I wouldn't highly recommend reading on unless you've either seen the first film, or simply don't care one way or another. But without further adieu, let's get into it. In the first film, the honourable House Atreides are essentially given planet Arrakis by the Emperor of the Universe, Shaddam VI (Now played by Christopher Walken), taking it away from the House Harkonnen who, in turn, launch an attack to wipe Atreides out, all for control of a substance called "spice" which is the only means for interstellar travel. Following these events, Paul Atreides (Timothée Chalamet) and his Mother, Lady Jessica (Rebecca Ferguson) survive these attacks, and head for the Fremen (the native race of Arrakis) sanctuary of Sietch Tabr. While there, a bit more light is shed on Paul's role in this story, as a Fremen named Stilgar (Javier Bardem) and several others see that Paul and Jessica could be there to fulfill a prophecy that will bring order to Arrakis. Still, however, some Fremen aren't swayed so easily, believing they could be spies, and Chani (Zendaya) and her friend, Shishakli (Souheila Yacoub) believe the prophecy to be an all-out lie. Said prophecy includes a lot of stuff that comes "as written", as Stilgar mentions almost too many times in this, and slowly but surely both Paul and Jessica begin to fulfil the propechy on both of their ends. Chani eventually gives respect to Paul when he promises that he wishes to fight alongside them as opposed to rule over them as the prophecy seems to foretell. Meanwhile, a pregnant Jessica earns the ability to communicate with her unborn child, Alia, through injesting "The Water of Life" as a whole part of her end of prophecy fulfillment. I'm sure I'm missing a lot of important information here, so forgive me. On the Harkonnen end of things, after a series of spice raids on them from the Fremen, Chani and Paul, included, Baron Harkonnen (Stellan Skarsgård) replaces his nephew, Rabban (Dave Bautista) as the new Arrakis ruler with his other nephew, the totally badass but psychotic Feyd-Rautha (Austin Butler) who sort of becomes the big baddie in this chapter, complete with a beautifully shot arena scene in black and white to artistically reflect the "black and white", primitive and brutal Harkonnen way of life, so a definite kudos to them for letting the audience feel the Harkonnen as oppsed to just seeing and hearing them. I know I've still glazed over a few things in explanation, but just to speak of the quality of the movie, it's one that should definitely be seen on the big screen if one is genuinely interested in seeing what happens after 'Dune' ('21). Any sort of effects, CG or practical manage to jump off the screen with their epic quality, and it's pretty plain to see that this is the "next big thing" (as far as box office epics go). While it may not necessarily be in my wheelhouse as something I'll return to again and again, these movies are nevertheless solid and do a good job of reminding us that some things non-superhero can still demand a big-screen viewing. 5/5 This was one of those titles this year that sort of hovered in existence amid other titles that might put butts in seats. Admittedly, the advertising for this one wasn't entirely effective, and I was only really drawn in by Ethan Coen's name behind the film along with the stylistic look of it. The thing is, the trailer is altogether pretty misleading, offering up a fun road-trip looking 'Thelma & Louise' style adventure with a few solid names attached to it. The reality is that this is more of a story about two contrasting lesbian characters than anything else. To be perfectly clear, I don't have a problem with what the film turned out to be, it's just that it didn't turn out to be what I expected. It should also be noted that the other big names we see in the trailer like Matt Damon and Pedro Pascal are barely a part of things, and show up just to say "look who's here!" And while the film isn't without a bit of casually dark humour as Ethan Coen is known for, in order to enjoy this one to any degree, one will have to let go of some of the greater expectations they have from the name. In other words, this could be considered another 'Burn After Reading' for some. Taking place in 1999, Philadelphia, we meet Jamie (Margaret Qualley), a lady living her life in the fast lane, cheating enough on her lover, Sukie (Beanie Feldstein) that it leads her to getting kicked out of their apartment. While she's figuring out what to do about her situation, she learns that her friend, Marian (Geraldine Viswanathan) is planning to head out to Tallahassee, FL to visit family, so she requests to come along for the road trip. To do so, they go to a drive-away car service in which someone drives a car from one place to another for another client. The pair ask about a car destined to Tallahassee, which confuses the shop owner, Curlie (Bill Camp) a bit, but he shrugs it off and gives the girls the keys. It turns out his confusion was warranted, however, as someone else had already booked a car for Tallahassee; three criminals, Arliss (Joey Slotnick), Flint (C.J. Wilson) and Chief (Colman Domingo), who seemingly leads the team. Here, we find out that Jamie and Marian are, by no fault of their own, carrying something very sensitive in a mysterious briefcase. From there, Arliss and Flint begin the chase, questioning everyone the "Dolls" have been in contact with along the way. That's pretty much the plot, and it doesn't sound as misleading as I might have mentioned, but that plot does take a back seat to the other story here. What the film is really about is two friends; Jamie, who's wild and free, and Marian, who's far more conservative and a bit uptight, and Jamie trying to get Marian to loosen up and enjoy life more. All the while the pair share some sexual tension within their friendship as well, so things do indeed get a bit spicy with this one as one, again, might not take away from the trailer. I think the worst thing about this one is that before seeing the movie, I joked about what the precious contents of the briefcase might be, and it turned out I actually called it. Despite having a good laugh about accidentally calling it with a joke, that's also the problem - It really was a joke, and to some degree, that makes things kind of disappointing. Between that, a total tease of star power and things being pretty misleading, I definitely have my criticisms. I don't have any hate towards it, really, but I have to say I was disappointed on the whole, and when it comes to the Coen name, there are much better titles out there. To put it another way, I could see this getting something of a cult following over time, considering its overall subject matter, and the fact that it was a box office flop, so not a whole hell of a lot of people went to check it out upon its release. I didn't hate it, I didn't love it, it's misleading and pretty silly overall, but it's also not really without its moments. I think as long as one can go in with their minds open and know that this is more of a movie about a lesbian relationship than anything else it can be a decent time. But again, not the top of the Coen list of great movies. 3/5 Here's an opportunity to talk a bit about how I feel about Sony and their "Spider-Verse". When it came to 'Venom' and 'Let There Be Carnage', they weren't great, but I enjoyed the execution of the titular characters. As for 'Morbius', it was just kinda "there" and ultimately forgettable. Nothing, however actually got completely under my skin until this, and even though none of the aforementioned titles were that good, this one takes the cake. All comic book/superhero universes combined, this is one of the worst modern titles I've seen yet. Even upon hearing it was gonna be Sony's next project in their "Not-Spider-Man" line of 'Spider-Man' related films, I had to wonder who the hell was asking for it. The ONLY excuse I can think of is that they felt like they needed a hero to come in and battle all these villains Sony has been working on getting together. I'm no expert when it comes to the complete universe of 'Spider-Man', but I'm relatively sure that Madame Web is not nor has ever been a "main character" so much as a side character who's only ever popped up here and there. I seem to remember her being more of an old lady, as well, but I guess that's Hollywood for ya. We open in Peru, 1973, where explorers Ezekiel Sims (Tahar Rahim) and his pregant partner, Constance Webb (Kerry Bishé) are in search of a rare spider that is said to have healing properties in its venom. Legend has it that the spider has given rise to a tribe in the area who have superior climbing and jumping abilities and... they're basically a tribe of "Spider-Men" who don't have web-shooters. Anyway, the spider is found, Ezekial betrays their exploration team and, in the process, leaves a dying Constance behind. The "Spider-Tribe" manages to save the baby, Cassandra, but (spoiler alert) Constance doesn't make it. Fast-forward to 2003, where Cassandra (Dakota Johnson) works as a paramedic, accompanied by work partners *sigh* Ben Parker (Adam Scott), who's actually married to a Mary Parker (Emma Roberts), and O'Neil (Mike Epps). During one particularly dangerous call, "Cassie" has a near-death experience, and to make a long story short, she discovers that she can see into the future, giving her the ability to hopefully prevent future tragedy. Meanwhile, Ezekiel has developed limited precognition (among other Spider-Man related abilities including the ability to make his own Spider-suit that may get butts into theatre seast with a trailer). Ezekiel's precogntion leads him to believe that three teenage girls, Julia Cornwall (Sydney Sweeney), Anya Corazon (Isabela Merced), and Mattie Franklin (Celeste O'Connor). would one day kill him, and his motivation through the film is as simple as "get to them before they get to him." The rest of it is essentally an escort mission movie involving Cassie protecting the teenagers from Ezekiel's constant attacks dressed as a dark Spider-Man. Alhough, I will be somewhat fair in that Ezekiel Sims' character does have similar abilities to Spidey in the comics, and each of the teenagers are representing different "Spider-Women" from the comics. So, I think I see what they were going for. Usually, if I do a little bit of homework on these characters, I can find things the movie did that were "right", so to speak, but I have to say right off the bat that if you came to see these "Spider-Women" do their thing, you get a grand total of maybe about 30 seconds of action and most of the movie is just a guy who looks like a dark Spider-Man chasing the group around while Madame Web uses her abilities to protect them. At the end of the day, it's too many characters with nothing much happening, a bunch of easy-to-call cliches, and really bad dialogue including the line "If you accept the responsibility, the power will come" and if you know anything about 'Spider-Man', you know what line that is trying to be. I'm genuinely curious to see where Sony goes from here, but it's not like with other properties that might have me excited for their futures. This is almost more like watching a very slow trainwreck happen, and it's baffling to me that Sony's animated 'Spider-Verse' movies with Miles Morales are so good while these live action flicks just keep failing harder and harder every time. If that's not enough, this comes from the writers of the hard fail that was 'Morbius', and directed by S.J. Clarkson, who was at the helm of 'Jessica Jones' and 'The Defenders', so this is about the level of quality we're looking at here. 1/5 Director Matthew Vaughn is one of those directors who, in my opinion, when he hits, he knocks it out of the park. Movie's like 'Stardust', 'Kick-Ass', 'X-Men: First Class' and the FIRST 'Kingsman' movie were all great for what they were. But it feels like once 'Kingsman: The Secret Service' hit, Vaughn has not been able to escape that world of making espionage "hip", so to speak. So at least going by the trailer for this, I knew a bit of what to expect. I went in thinking it would probably be all right as a fun romp, but what I got was... well, I'll just say worse. Before getting into this, I'd like to bring up Bryce Dallas Howard and the fact that she is one of my least favourite actresses (but a pretty great director!) To be clear, I have nothing against her. But she always seems to end up playing a character I don't like, be it the girlfriend from '50/50', Hilly Holbrook from 'The Help', or Claire of the 'Jurassic World' series. Hell, I consider the 'Nosedive' episode of 'Black Mirror' one of its all-time best episodes, but her character in that is still easily loathed (until the end). The point is, I've just never really seen her in anything where I'm routing for her, and 'Argylle' continues this trend. Here, Howard plays Elly Conway, a novelist who writes spy novels centred on a character named Aubrey Argylle (Henry Cavill), who we often see in fantasy play-outs, along with, to a lesser extent, his Bond-like femme fatale, Lagrange (Dua Lipa) and his partner, Wyatt (John Cena). And when I say "lesser extent" I mean, if you came here to see them, you're done in about ten minutes. Anyway, Elly lives an introverted life, cozy at home with her cat (the poster-boy for this movie), Alfie. One day her mother (Catherine O'Hara) calls her to pay a visit, so she and Alfie hop on a train. On the train, she meets a real spy by the name of Aidan Wylde (Sam Rockwell) who, after they get attacked on the train, tells her that a secret group known as The Division, led by Director Ritter (Bryan Cranston) is tracking her because, supposedly, her novels predict future events. From there, the film unfolds with a lot of lazy writing, time-filler, confusion, and so many unnecessary twists and turns that M. Night Shyamalan would look at it and say "okay, calm down." Honestly, this movie is all over the place. It keeps you guessing, sure, but there's just too damn much of it. In fact, I'd even say it starts to feel like a parody after a while. Going back to Howard for a bit, here, she feels like a helpless character along for the ride who spends the whole time in distress, remind me a bit of Willie from 'Temple of Doom', which is never a good thing. Once again, nothing against the person, but I really wanna see what she can do aside from a character who, quite frankly, kind of annoys me. To her credit, however, she did direct a few solid episodes of 'Mandalorian' and 'Book of Boba Fett', so I'm not just brushing her aside as something "bad". She's also not entirely what makes me dislike this movie, so much as almost everything else about it. The big question on everyone's mind is probably something along the lines of "what's up with this cat?" Without spoiling anything, I'm just gonna say that for the most part, he's there to be a cute addition to everything going on. There is a reason for him to be there but when you see what it is, you see what I mean when I say "lazy writing." This is from Jason Fuchs, who wrote the screenplay for 'Wonder Woman', so we know he can do better. This just has a lot of situations in which a character needs a quck escape so something is just made up on the spot. It gets to the point of there being no real tension because you just know better. Going back to Matthew Vaughn now, I kind of hate that he's trapped in this fantasy spy world now. While the first 'Kingsman' movie was great, none of its following chapters quite matched up in quality, and I really wanna see him go back to directing some of those adaptations, because I feel like 'Stardust', 'Kick-Ass' and 'First Class' were among his best works. But even with the way this ends, we can tell he's not done with this spy stuff yet. I guess people still enjoy it, but I feel like there's a lot of what could be that we're missing out on with him. This could have been much better than it was, especially after seeing the mid-credit scene, which just kinda buried the film further. 2/5 |