Hitman: Agent 47
If you remember my review on 'Hitman' you might recall that, and I quote, "I just plain didn't care". 'Hitman' was extremely average as an action flick, and felt a bit more like a movie within a movie. To top that all off, it was also a game collection never took any interest in. I think I had a demo for the first one, tried it, and it was just like these movies - okay at best. What can I say? It was another popular title I didn't quite latch on to. But once again, reviewing this as more as its own movie than a movie based on a game, it all just lands on one simple non-word - "meh".
Going a bit more into Agent 47's origins, we learn (again?) that 47 (Rupert Friend - because Timothy Olyphant had better things to do) is a genetically enhanced super soldier who was created by a geneticist named Dr. Petr Litvenko (Ciarán Hinds). 47 becomes a hitman for the fictional ICA (International Contracts Agency) after Litvenko abandons the project due to a guilty conscience. For the last few years, 47 has been on the trail of Litvenko's daughter, Katia (Hannah Ware). Scared for her life, and cursed with a superhuman awareness of the world around her, she goes along with a man named John Smith (Zachary Quinto), who offers her protection.
In the meantime, there is a group of mercenaries, led by a man named Delriego (Rolf Kanies) trying to find Litvenko in an attempt to recreate the Agent program for their own selfish means. Also, when it comes to Katia, she is searching for an unnamed man who may or may not have more of a connection to her than she could imagine - in fact, so does Agent 47. And with all that said, what can I say? I probably cared about this one even less than the first. I can't quite put my finger on what it is about 'Hitman' that I can't seem to get into, but much like I said in my last 'Hitman' review - it's simply not for me. Considering a lot of the video game titles I do like, that is honestly pretty strange, but here we are.
To keep it plain and simple, this is another example of a movie that uses other movies to piece itself together. Although I must admit that the film didn't have my full attention, there are hints of the first couple of 'Terminator' movies going on here, along with... well, more of the same of the previous film. As far as action flicks go, it's kind of generic, and there's nothing here that really holds my attention. In fact, in trying to remember bits about the first film at this point, even though my review was recent enough, I've already forgotten most of what happened.
There are other video game movies - some of the even worse in quality than this - that can hold my attention better, and I can manage to keep good memories of. Sometimes they're flat out bad movies, but at least they are entertaining in a cheesy way ('Street Fighter' being my prime example).In my opinion, on a shelf of video game movies, these flicks would be titles that I'd completely overlook in search of something else I could have more fun with. The funny thing is, these movies aren't even that terrible, they're just all-out forgettable. They're another fine example of movies you should throw your brain out the window to enjoy.
However, I should probably mention that the "brain out the window" thing can only go so far. This didn't feel, to me, something I could look back on and have fun with, re-watching it and laughing with some friends. 'Super Mario Bros', 'Street Fighter', 'Mortal Kombat', they all have that corny quality where we see that they're pretty bad, but we still have a good time because it's all so dumb. This is more a matter of it being an action flick for a boring Sunday afternoon when you're super bored. If action movies were cups of coffee, this would be a small, regular - average at best, not enough to be memorable, and something you'd "drink" for a little pick me up as opposed to your glorious morning cup.
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